Monday, June 30, 2008

"Only Bush and Rove Can Attack McCain's Military Record"

We missed "Face the Nation" this weekend, on which Gen. Wesley Clark made this mild and quite accurate statement concerning St. John McBush: "I don't think getting in a fighter plane and getting shot down is a qualification to become president." One doesn't get executive experience either from the sensation of bailing out of a fighter or spending time in a North Vietnamese prison. It would qualify you as a patriot and hero, but not necessarily pass muster as commander-in-chief material. That's all Gen. Clark was saying.

You would think he'd called St. John a "mooslim" who wanted to bring all his relatives from Africa over here illegally, given the immediate move to Defcon 4 in the McBush campaign, wingnut media and their willing handmaiden, the "main stream media." NBC/MSNBC's Andrea Mitchell has been breaking out, anew, and clutching her pearls all day. CNN's Rick "The Prick" Sanchez, for example, asked, "Did Wesley Clark pull a Swift Boat on John McCain today?" Uh, no 'tard, he didn't. We know who was Swift Boated, and by whom. By the way, we also know that McBush has brought on Bud Day, one of the Swift Boaters, to help with his "truth" squad - we see a huge contradiction there, St. John.

But, thanks to Firedoglake, we can return to yesteryear and see who's allowed to question St. John's military record. Swift Boat that, Rick!

Fighting Teh Stoopid

Today's WaPo gives us this depressing piece by Eli Saslow, "In Flag City USA, False Obama Rumors Are Flying." Jim Peterman, of Findlay, Ohio, is wondering for whom to cast his vote. He's seen the Obama ads, but he's also heard from his neighbors, like Leroy "Missing Link" Pollard who tells him Obama is a radical Muslim from Africa who's going to "bring his family over here, illegally." So, Mr. Peterman wonders about Obama:

"I haven't read his books or studied up more than a little bit. But it's hard to ignore what you hear when everybody you know is saying it. These are good people, smart people, so can they really all be wrong?"

Um, duh, lemme take my shoes off here so I can count my...oh, I guess I don't need to do that to give you an answer: YES! YES! THEY'RE ALL WRONG. And, by the way, THEY'RE NOT SMART PEOPLE (and probably not as good people as you think, either)!!!

For God's sake, is this the state of the American electorate, or is it just that all the simpletons have moved to Findlay, Ohio?

(Image: Your average (?) voter in Findlay, Ohio.)

Friday, June 27, 2008

Am I A "Hep Cat" Now?

MTV announced the other day that, for the first time in its history, it would accept political advertisements.

In that spirit, we suggest this video for McBush to use on MTV. Now strike a pose, Johnny! Vogue!

A Good Deed

The Rev. Kirbyjon Caldwell, head of the largest Methodist congregaton in the country, is pushing back at American Taliban leader James Dobson, the self-anointed Bible expert who recently questioned Obama's Christian beliefs. Caldwell launched a website called James Dobson Doesn't Speak For Me, and encourages visitors to sign a statement saying that Dobson doesn't represent them. Caldwell heads the 14,000 member Windsor Village United Methodist Church in Houston, and participates in a weekly Friday prayer call with Obama's staff and other Christian ministers.

As an added treat, Caldwell introduced Dumbya at the 2000 Republican National Convention and officiated at Jenna Bush's wedding in May, but now supports Obama.

Quote of the Day

"Anyone who tells you this will lower our gas prices anytime soon is blowing smoke." California Governor Schwarznegger, on John "Smokey" McBush's proposal for increased off-shore drilling.

One Duke University scholar said that the small amount of oil to be recovered off-shore wouldn't be seen at the gas pumps for at least 5 years, and that it was like expecting to lose weight by walking an extra 20 feet a day.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

More On (Moron?) the Brain-Dead Media

Daily Kos has an edifying piece today, focusing largely on three numbnuts who happen to write for the increasingly horrific Washington Post: Richard Cohen, David Broder and Ruth Marcus. But the piece extends to media coverage of the election so far, which, to no one's surprise is seen by Democrat, Independent and Republican alike as poor.

(Photo: Cohen, Broder and Marcus, interchangeable concern monkeys)

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Please Crawl Back Under Your Rock

Every four years, like the cycle of a destructive pest, Ralph "Nadir" Nader reemerges from under his rock. In 2000, Nader votes in Florida totaled over 97,000, effectively giving Bush the election when Florida's votes were "counted." Polls say that he siphoned those votes primarily from people who, given the choice only between Gore and Bush, would have broken for Gore by a wide margin. He ran again in 2004, but received barely one-third of one percent of the total vote cast.

Today, in an interview with the Rocky Mountain News, Nader accused Sen. Obama of talking "white" to appeal to "white guilt," and of not addressing issues important in "the ghettos." Aside from the factual errors in his remarks, "Nadir" reveals a condescending, racist attitude that African Americans should be talking like African Americans, not like him. He thinks Obama should be more focused on "black" issues, and leave the "white" issues to white folks. He's a sad, narcissistic buffoon, who has a habit of leveling regular assaults against Democrats but seems shy about taking on the Republican candidates. Maybe if John McSame tried to "talk black" he'd get "Nadir's" attention, too.

(Village Voice photo of the incredibly shrinking "Nadir")

"Think" Tanks

Just to remind ourselves that "deep thinkers" don't have all the answers (in the case of the neo-con think tanks, make that none of the answers), take a look at this timeless piece by Bill Maher. "Nostradamus" Kristol. Hmmm, I like it!

(h/t to Tokyo bureau chief Brian)

Quote of the Day

"I am reminded of the great talents of the, of our Philippine-Americans when I eat dinner at the White House" - - Preznit Bushit, addressing Philippine President Gloria Arroyo, referring to the White House chef.

He makes you proud, doesn't he? All that practice in dealing with the help at the country clubs paid off. (By the way, the Chimpster's approval rating is now at 23%).

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

(Psst. . .C'mon al Qaeda, We Dare Ya!)

McSame senior political advisor Charlie "Foot In Mouth" Black had some 'splainin' to do after he said that a terrorist attack on the U.S. would help McSame politically. While F.I.M. apologized, the damage to McSame's hidden agenda was done. The Rethugs know that playing on fears and then acting like the tough guy wins some voters over; it's just that they don't want to be caught secretly hoping for another terrorist attack.

We suppose F.I.M. could have said "bring 'em on." That would have really been Mission Accomplished for the Dems.

Turdblossom's Tin Ear

Former architect of the former permanent Republican majority Karl "Turdblossom" Rove was reported recently to have made the following remark about Sen. Obama at a breakfast for Rethug "insiders":

"He's the guy at the country club with the beautiful date, holding a martini and cigarette that stands against the wall and makes snide comments about everyone who passes by."

"Country club?" "Martini?" Please, Turdblossom, only those well-heeled members of your audience would be able to relate to your imagery. In fact, the guy you portray sounds a lot more like the smirking dimbulb of a Preznit who gave you your snide nickname and who you helped inflict on America, not like a guy who was raised by a single mom on the southside of Chicago. But it does highlight that your tin-eared reality, and that of the "insiders" you were sharing this ridiculous view with, is defined by the country club, the martini, and the "hot" date. Rethug values exposed again!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Wee Willie Kristol, Too Proud To Serve

Salon's Alex Koppelman points out the hypocrisy of neocon chickenhawk William "Wee Willie" Kristol, who devotes his column in today's New York Times to the anti-McSame ad depicting a mother who won't let her child serve in Iraq in the future. Self awareness didn't stand in the way of Wee Willie when he wrote his piece. The fact is that Wee Willie thought that he had better things to do than serve in the military (like 5 Deferment Dick Cheney), and was a leading cheerleader to send other peoples' family members off to Iraq. The smarmy little creep hasn't sacrificed anything, and never will, but he'll see to it that you do the sacrificing for him. That's the neocon chickenhawk credo.

The Tanned and Lovely Gov. Crist

Pandagon has this piece on possible McBush running mate Gov. Charlie "Eat Your Heart Out, Man-Tan Boehner!" Crist. As the piece notes, rumors have been flying for some time about Crist (but then, so have rumors about Rethug Sen. Lindsey Graham, Sen. Mitch McConnell, Rep. Patrick McHenry, etc., etc.). Hackwhackers, being non-judgemental about matters of personal sexuality, hasten to add: "Not that there's anything wrong with it!"

What is wrong is the hypocrisy, not to mention the notion that it would be more to his credit for Crist to be noodling with a married woman than to be gay. What a sewer these people live in!

George Carlin, R.I.P.

It was sad to see that comedian George Carlin died yesterday in Santa Monica, CA of heart failure at age 71. Carlin pushed the envelope in his humor, but was never cruel or nasty. Carlin hosted the first Saturday Night Live, won 4 Grammys, was nominated for 5 Emmys, and was due to receive the Kennedy Center's Mark Twain Award next November.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Quote of the Day

"Why would Bloomberg want us to use less gas? Is he still on his green kick? He should be finding ways to help people rather than telling us to use less." New York driver Anthony LoBosco, who had just filled up his SUV with $71 in gasoline. God forbid Anthony should tighten his long belt, or realize that lowered demand would prompt lower prices.

Suggestions for Anthony: lose your gas guzzler, or enlist in the Army so you can defend our access to middle eastern oil.

(photo: Anthony, is that you, "moran"?)

From The Unintentional Humor Department

We saw this clip on Think Progress of the perpetually outraged Lou Dobbs, wagging his oversized head in mock disbelief. He thinks there's a reason for impeaching the Chimpster. Lying to get us into war? Warrantless wiretaps? Using U.S. attorneys to go after political opponents? Keep guessing.

Food poisoning from tomatoes.

Lou, you're a funny guy, except when you're trying to be funny. The next thing you'll be saying is that it's a plot by illegal Meskins to poison our salsa.

Just kidding about the salsa, Lou, don't quote us. Lou? LOU!! Uh oh, it's too late.

(photo: Article 1 of Lou's Articles of Impeachment; Lou is checking whether avocados can be Article 2)

Some Good News

The latest Newsweek national poll has Sen. Obama with a 15-point lead over Sen. John McBush, 51-36. It's way too early to think that these numbers will hold - - especially once the Rethug smear machine gets into full gear - - but it shows that a lot of Sen. Clinton's supporters and independents are realizing that they can't afford another 4 years of the same policies.

Bloomberg on "Demagogues"

New York City's Independent (formerly Republican) Mayor Michael Bloomberg had some strong remarks about wingnut attempts to caricature Barack Obama. According to "The Trail" in this morning's WaPo, Bloomberg "told a Jewish audience in Florida that 'demagogues' were engaging in a 'whisper campaign' against Obama, and he urged Jews to 'reject' such wedge politics 'loudly, clearly and unequivocally.'" Bloomberg continued,

"As I'm sure many of you know, there are plenty of e-mails floating around the Internet targeting Jewish voters and saying that Senator Obama is secretly a Muslim, and a radical one at that... Let's call those rumors what they are -- lies."

Bravo, Mayor Bloomberg! Let's hear more truth-telling about this shameful tactic.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Rudy, Rudy, Rudy

The Onion reports on where Rudy "Toot Toody" Giuliani can be found when he's not giving his "noun/ verb/ 9-11" speech upon the dog whistle command of Sen. McBush.

Veepstakes, Cont'd.

Hmmm... the buzz about Republican Sen. Chuck Hagel as Obama's VP running mate is intriguing. Highly unlikely, but intriguing. (We consider Hagel to be one of those principled conservatives who happens to be a Republican -- as distinguished from the Rethugs and Rebunglecans who over-populate his party.)

Yes, intriguing -- but, given this good news, he may not need much help in the VP slot.

Take the (Non-Federal) Money and Run!

The "main stream media" is full of righteous indignation over Barack Obama's decision to opt out of the Federal campaign funding system. Not that they couldn't see this coming for months. Egged on by McBush and the Rethugs, they've been waiting to jump on Obama, some because they're in the St. John McBush camp (Fox Nutwork, CNN, Washington Post, etc.), some because they want to make the election as close as possible in order to sell more papers/ electrons -- not mutually exclusive groups, by the way.

These are the same hacks that breezed over St. John's flip flopping over the Bush tax cuts for the wealthy, off-shore oil drilling and the immigration bill he helped author. All of McBush's flip flops were his tacking to the right to shore up his wingnut base (far more fragile than the MSM would have you believe). These are policy flip flops that actually have an impact on everyday Americans, not a procedural issue, long coming, as to whether Obama maximizes his war chest to battle the upcoming smear campaign the Rethugs and their 527 groups are going to launch. And McBush has some 'splaining to do on his gaming of the campaign finance system.

So to these amoralists and feeders at the trough of profit and simple-mindedness, we say: "Stick this manufactured flap into the same sunless hole you put your flag pins and madrassas, and other caricatures." And to Obama we say: "Take your non-Federal money and run!"

Dirty Dick Implicated In CIA Leak?

It looks like it. "Vice" Preznit Dirty Dick Cheney can't be excluded from the scandal involving the leak of Valerie Plame's classified CIA identity, according to former White House press secretary Scott McClellan. Testifying before the House Judiciary Committee, McClellan could not say that Dirty Dick wasn't involved in the orchestrated effort to expose the wife of Joseph Wilson, the former ambassador who blew the whistle on the Bushit Assministration's false claims that Saddam Hussein's government was purchasing uranium yellow cake from Niger. By outing Valerie Plame in an attempt to intimidate critics of the war, Federal law was broken. Last year, former special prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald alluded to the fact that, after "Scooter" Libby's conviction, there remained unnamed, "unindicted" participants in the attempt to expose Plame as a CIA agent.

Dirty Dick knew. He orchestrated it. Why would Scooter get out on a limb without his boss', Dirty Dick's, backing? Bastards.

Love The Smirk

Photo of Preznit Katrina Bush returning from his whirlwind 3-hour tour of flooded areas in Iowa. Nice to see the trip made the right impression on him. Heckuva job.

(photo: y. gripas/getty images)

McSame's "Didn't Love America" Moment

MSNBC's Dan Abrams dug up a clip from a John McSame interview last March in which he says, "I didn't really love America until I was deprived of her company."

Now, I think we can all agree that McSame was saying that it was only when he was a prisoner of war that he came to appreciate how much he loved his country, right? Imagine how this statement would be treated by right wingers if McSame were a Dem; it would be broadcast on Fux News and on right wing talk radio as "I didn't. . .love America." Far right shills like Charles Kraphammer and Wee Willie Kristol would run with it as evidence of his lack of patriotism. That's how they twisted Michelle Obama's "proud of America for the first time" statement earlier this year (to her credit, Laura Bush came to Ms. Obama's defense; Cindy McSame didn't, and won't). That's how they behave, because they don't dare run honestly on the issues of importance to Americans.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Mr. Beck, Let Me Introduce Your Ass to a Hole in the Ground

We know CNN and hate-radio melon head Glenn Beck has had issues with his ass. What is now being confirmed is that Glenn also is unable to distinguish his ass from a hole in the ground, especially when that hole is an oil well in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge (ANWR). Seems he was off by just a leeeetle bit in describing the awesome results of drilling in ANWR. Fortunately, Glenn's audience has been shrinking so much in the past year that only a few "morans" heard the laughable "fact" from the reality-starved blowhard.

(Photo: Melon head clinging to "Beck," his autoerotic phallic symbol. Pump it, Glenn, pump it like an oil well!)

UPDATE! We wonder if Glenn was looking for that hole in the ground when this happened to him today.

The Bungled War on Terrorism

Ever since the attacks on 9/11, the conventional wisdom has been that the Rethuglicans have the political advantage when discussing national security. Dems, it is thought, should stick to health care, education, and the economy. Luckily, Sen. Obama hasn't bought into the conventional wisdom and - - along with Sen. Joe Biden - - is going on offense when it comes to the war on terrorism. Obama's point is that when the Bush Assministration decided to attack Iraq, it took its eye off of the battle with al Qaeda in Afghanistan and the northwest frontier of Pakistan. Bin Laden and his high command are still at large after seven years.

The lengths to which the Bush Assministration went to in falsifying, manipulating or disregarding intelligence concerning WMDs in Iraq is a sign that 9/11 provided needed cover for them to take care of unfinished business from Bush 41's administration: the toppling of Saddam Hussein. The unfinished business of 9/11 remains, and that's nothing that the Rethugs should be proud of.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Vulgarian at the Post

This morning's WaPo brought another dropping from former Bush speechwriter Michael "Mushroom Cloud" Gerson, an op/ed entitled "Vulgarian at the Gate." Gerson, who earned his nickname by inserting the misleading and highly emotional image into the Assministration's lexicon on the non-existent nuclear threat from Saddam Hussein, has his panties in a knot that Al Franken is someone who uses vulgar language on occasion (and, more significantly, is in danger of beating Rethug Norm Coleman's butt in the Senate race in Minnesota). Gerson, whose exquisite sensibilities about morality apparently don't extend as far as having the intellectual courage/ ability to stop condoning the lies and killing his patron Dumbya (and to some extent flunkies like he) is responsible for in the run-up and execution of the unnecessary war in Iraq. We'll take Franken's vulgarities over Gerson's any day.

Another Cindy McBush Recipe for Disaster

Poor Cindy McBush! She's been caught with her hand in the cookie jar again. You may recall back in April she foisted some "family recipes" off on the McBush web site which turned out to be from the Food Network. Luckily, they found a poor schlub to blame and fire. Now, it seems the same thing has happened, this time it's an oatmeal-butterscotch cookie recipe from Hersheys that she offered (without attribution) to the Family Circle magazine.

Meanwhile, here's an easy way to tell if a recipe has actually come from Cindy McCain's household: before each step in the recipe, it would say, "Tell the cook to..."

(Photo: "The Trollop* with a Dollop.")

* John McBush's characterization of his wife.

Lara Logan, The Best

This clip, via Crooks and Liars, features Lara Logan, CBS' chief foreign correspondent, talking about the war in Iraq. It is riveting. She spent years in Iraq covering the invasion and occupation, and has been critical of the U.S. media coverage of late. This is what an independent journalist should sound like (yeah OK, look like, too; she's gorgeous). The Villagers of the Washington media should be ashamed.

Celtics Win

They're not our home team, but it was a sentimental moment to see the Boston Celtics win the NBA title last night by a whopping 131-92 over the LA Lakers. The trio of Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce, and Ray Allen were inspired. After all the years of the Lakers in the spotlight, the Kobe Bryant/Shaq dramas, celebrity LA fans, etc., it's nice to see a great Eastern "blue collar" team come back after 22 years without a championship. The late Red Auerbach would be lighting up a cigar about now.

McSame Gets Gas Behind Him

Think Progress points out that Sen. John McSame's campaign is fueled by oil and gas interests to the tune of 74 percent since he announced for President. He's now in support of expanded off-shore drilling - - which will delight the voters in Florida and other coastal states - - just like Preznit Oilpatch. Unfortunately, it's unlikely to provide any meaningful increase to oil supplies, but it will drive up costs at the pump because the oil companies will have to recover exploration and drilling costs before any oil is produced. It's nothing but a big wet kiss to the oil and gas companies in exchange for their financial support.

(photo: can't. . . .quite. . . .hold. . . .it. . . )

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Showing Their True Colors

The Texas Rethugs were trotting out a new button at their state party convention. Makes you proud.

Cross burning to follow the evening keynote address.

We Get It; Now Please Do Your Jobs

Slate's Jack Shafer has a contrary view to the 24/7 cable (mostly) media homage being paid to Tim Russert. There's no disputing that Russert was a model husband, father and son, and was known for his work ethic, fairness, generosity, and loyalty. Spending some time in tributes is the right thing to do, but we have to agree with Shafer that at some point you have to get on with your job of reporting the news. What did MSNBC say this weekend about the horrible flooding and human tragedy in Iowa and the midwest? Growing problems in Afghanistan? Our struggling middle class? Nada.

Rib-Cracker of the Week

Wonkette has an unintentionally hilarious vid produced for Rethug Sen. John Cornyn's appearance at the Texas State GOP convention. Check out Wonkette's alternative lyrics. Also check out the dude "cowboy" hat, vest and jeans Cornyn sports in the vid. Someone's been shopping at Nieman Marcus! This is a man who made his millions in law, not ropin' an' ridin'. Is it "shockingly gay," as Wonkette says? You be the judge -- but just make sure your bladder is empty before you click on the video!

Lanny Inanity

We saw this news item that Lanny "The Fanny" Davis, one of Sen. Clinton's most unhinged surrogates, is going to the Fux News channel as a contributor. The Fanny's eruptions against Sen. Obama were legendary, and his performance on CNN on the night of the Indiana and North Carolina primaries caused the other panelists to laugh at him for his over-the-top, other reality views on the state of the campaign.

He and Clinton campaign chair Terry McAuliffe were lavish in their praise for Fux's "balanced coverage" during the primaries. Translation: the Fux folks were pulling for Hillary knowing that she would energize the Rethug base which hates her, and give McSame a needed edge.

More Trouble In Afghanistan

There are increasing signs that the Taliban and al Qaeda are on the rise in Afghanistan. Last week, hundreds of militants escaped from jail in southern Afghanistan, and are overrunning several districts there. One of their most influental leaders, Maulavi Haqqani, is closely tied to Pakistan's intelligence service and has been active in providing training and sanctuary to al Qaeda and other foreign militants.

When the Bush Assministration took their eye of the ball in Afghanistan and decided to throw our military power against Iraq, they gave the Taliban and al Qaeda - - the ones who actually attacked us - - time to regroup, rearm and rebuild in Afghanistan and Pakistan. That's the Bushit national security legacy. Whatever attacks come, they were made possible on Dumbya's watch.

Now, McSame and the Bushies are itching to fight on a third front: Iran. It's hard to see how we could have a more dangerous and bankrupt a national security policy than this.

From The Unintentional Humor Department

"I'm going to think about that, yes - - writing a book," said Preznit Dumbya in an interview with the London Observer.

The working title? "Presidentin' For Dummies."

Monday, June 16, 2008

"Elections Matter"

In a stirring speech tonight in Detroit, former Vice President Al Gore endorsed Barack Obama, saying

"If you think the next appointments to our Supreme Court are important, you know that elections matter. If you live in the city of New Orleans, you know elections matter...If you're a wounded veteran, you know elections matter. If you lost your job, if you're struggling with your mortgage, you know elections matter. If you care about a clean environment, if you want a government that protects you instead of special interests, you know elections matter..."

We can't help but think of what might have been had this man instead of Dumbya been elected in 2000 by the Supreme Court, and we can't think of a better clarion call for Americans in the upcoming election.

Goin' for the Women's Vote, Rethug-Style!

Texas oil millionaire and former Republican candidate for Governor of Texas Clayton "Yee-Haw" Williams was to host a McBush fundraiser today in Midland, Texas. However, the fundraiser, which already had sold $300,000 in tickets to the local Rethug deep-pockets, had to be canceled over the weekend. Seems the crusty old goat-cum-oilman made a remark comparing rape to bad weather: "As long as it's inevitable, you might as well lie back and enjoy it." (This is the same hilarious quip that got former Indiana coach and world-class authoritarian Bobby Knight into a heap o' trouble a few years back -- it must be circulating in Rethug circles. It's also the Bush Assministration's philosophy on hurricane relief.)

To its credit, and because it really had no choice once the comment was exposed, the McBush campaign said it will reschedule the event for a later time and dis-invited Mr. Williams. No sense in shining too bright a spotlight on what the Rethug base represents when you're trying to woo all them Clinton wimmen!!

A Boob Goes to Washington?

As reported in today's WaPo, Robert "My Eyes" Hurt, a Texas rancher and delegate to the State GOP convention, wanted to add a condemnation of nudity in public places in the Nation's Capital to the State party platform. Hurt, the father of 14(!), thinks the breastesses exposed in nude art in museums, fountains and other places in Washington "is sending the wrong message to children that nudity is fine." The State platform committee refused to adopt Hurt's suggestion (as well as his proposal to make the presidential term limit apply to spouses -- take that, Hillary!). While Mr. Hurt's issue raises the possibility of all kinds of humorous word play, we will limit our observation to this: if he succeeds in banning boobs in Washington, does that mean he can't go there anymore?

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Quote of the Week

"There's a danger if people say, 'Oh, it's the speculators.' We don't want to misdiagnose the problem." Bush Assministration Treasury Secretary Henry "Daddy Warbucks" Paulson trying to pooh-pooh the question of whether the oil price run up is due to speculators (an estimated 60% of the current price of crude oil has been attributed to commodities market speculators). Multimillionaire Paulson was speaking at the G-8 economic summit yesterday, and is the former Chairman and CEO of Goldman Sachs, a prominent investment bank heavily involved in... you're way ahead of me... the oil speculation market.

Photo: Paulson with ear muffs especially designed to keep him from hearing "Oh, it's the speculators, all right!"

Happy Father's Day!

It's the greatest thing in the world to be a dad.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Wearing Out The Welcome

Iraqi prime minister Maliki has rejected key terms of a long term security agreement that would establish U.S. military bases in Iraq indefinitely. At the same time, Moqtada al-Sadr, the militant Shiite leader, has called for a new initiative against U.S. forces. The presence of U.S. troops is a major issue in Iraqi politics, with the majority of Iraqi public opinion wanting troop withdrawals to begin.

This is clearly a setback for Preznit Dumbya, who had wanted the Iraqis to rename Baghdad as "Bushtown" by the end of his term. The Iraqis counter-offered to name a goat farm after him.

Rudy's Got A Brand New Bag

Former Rethug Presidential hopeful Rudi "Tooty" Giuliani has a new business: he's offering Rethug politicians the opportunity to hear him speak - - for a fee, because he needs to reduce his campaign debt.

We think we know what the gist of his speeches will be: a noun, a verb, and "9/11," maybe interrupted by a call on his cell phone from wife Judi. Worked so well before. . . .

Thursday, June 12, 2008

The Rethugs Pursue the Women's Vote...

...And here's how. Well done, "morans!"

Screen shot: GOP-TV's "cat fightin' wimmen."

"Deadbeat Congresswoman"

Even though the Rethugs have nearly cornered the market on corruption and bad behavior of all kinds (today's latest example, below), it would be remiss of Hackwhackers to not make note of the travails of a Democrat -- Rep. Laura Richardson (D-Calif.). As reported in today's WaPo, Rep. Richardson is not inclined to pay her bills, including loan defaults on two homes and another in foreclosure. She also owes money for repairs to her car, which she subsequently abandoned.

Photo: the Honorable(?) Rep. Richardson.

Leaving It In Las Vegas

Nevada Rethug Governor Jim "Ladies Man" Gibbons has been in a messy divorce battle with his wife, who is claiming that Ladies Man has been in an ongoing affair with the estranged wife of a Reno doctor. He's been spotted with her several times in Reno after his marital troubles began. You may remember last year that the Gov was involved in an incident in Las Vegas with a waitress, who claimed that he drunkenly propositioned and molested her in a parking garage. Who put the aphrodisiac in this guy's Geritol? It's been disclosed that he text messaged his current flame some 860 times using a government-supplied cell phone. Ladies Man claims that the messages were not love notes, even they were sent at very odd hours. Excuse us for a second. . . .


It's not likely that Ladies Man will bother to run for a second term, since it's hard to run with your pants around your ankles.

Objection, Your Dishonor

Right-wing radio hack and pill popper Rush Limpballs has carried lots of water for Preznit Dumbya over the years, so it's only fitting that Dumbya repay the Limpballs family with a federal appointment. That would be Limpballs' cousin, Stephen, who was appointed Federal District judge for the Eastern District of Missouri, after Senate confirmation (!).

(photo: Rush Limpballs, sporting his John Wayne Gacy look from yesteryear)

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Hands-On Diplomacy

Preznit Dumbya likes the personal touch in his "diplomacing." Chancellor Merkel of Germany has got to be thinking "why won't this jackass keep his hands off of me? Sarkozy would love a little shoulder massage."

News Item

From CNN, a story that Air India is grounding overweight flight attendants("hostesses" as Air India calls them), but not pilots, co-pilots, etc. They want their hostesses to look like this, but apparently it's OK for their pilots to look like this.

Excess baggage, anyone?

Quote of the Day

"I will veto every single beer. . ." - - Sen. John McAncient, talking about vetoing "bills" with earmarks if he were President.

(With apologies to Keith Olberman) We sense trouble brewing in the McAncient campaign, with his lack of skill at speaking coming to a head and since he's in the can with Busch, it looks like he'll be up Schlitz creek unless he hops to it; he can't wait much lager, or he'll be sadder, Budweiser.

Could McBush Lose Arizona?

The campaign of Sen. John McBush is worried that his home state of Arizona is in play for the November elections. An infighting Rethuglican party, slumping interest in the candidate, and registration drives that are producing more Dems and independents point to possible problems for him. His own campaign is now counting Arizona among the "battleground" states. Maybe by November, all of the "red" states will be battleground states.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

The Beginning of the Bump

Polling taken just days after the Clinton concession is showing a distinct "bump" for Sen. Obama. Gallup has it as 48% for Obama and 42% for McBush; Rasmussen has it as 50% for Obama and 44% for McBush. Actually, we think the Obama numbers might be a little low in the end, since the polling methodologies are resolutely sticking to traditional voter turnout models and essentially ignoring what just happened in the Democratic primaries (millions more registered and voting). George "I Left My Codpiece at Home; May I Borrow Yours?" Will opined this as well in an appearance on Tweety's show yesterday, saying the turnout factor is being ignored by the pollsters (he also says divisions on the Republican side are worse than on the Democratic side - and here's some proof). This is why you're hearing pundits hedging their bets, saying it's going to either be a close race or a landslide. Democrats have to continue reminding themselves, however, "It's only June."


We can't resist engaging in the current parlor game of divining who will be Sen. Obama's running mate, so here are some of our possibilities (in no particular order):

Sam Nunn, former Georgia Senator and respected military and nuclear non-proliferation expert; a "graybeard," Nunn will be 70 this fall (almost McAncient vintage) but could help Obama in the South.

Bob Graham, former Florida Senator and Governor, respected foreign intelligence maven; another "graybeard," Graham will be 72 by election day but would be an asset in Florida, a State the Dems would like to have another crack at.

Gen. Wesley Clark, former NATO Supreme Commander and presidential candidate, a Clinton backer and someone who would take care of any perceived "national security" experience deficit for an Obama ticket.

Ted Strickland, Governor of Ohio (need we say more?), he could also help bring in former Clintonistas and the "Appalachian demographic."

Jim Webb, first-term Virginia Senator, who has the military and foreign policy chops (as well as the aforementioned appeal to the "Appalachian demographic"), but is fairly new to the scene and only won his race against George "Macaca" Allen by 0.5% of the vote.

Ed Rendell, Governor of Pennsylvania, who has adamantly dismissed talk of a VP slot, saying "I like to be my own boss;" much the same appeal as Strickland, and Dems will likely carry Pennsylvania anyway. And, last but not least,

Evan Bayh, Senator and former Governor of Indiana, who has pulled 60+% of the vote in his contests in Indiana, could bring Indiana into the Dem column, and has the executive experience Obama would value.

Of course, there is no "perfect" VP selection. Each one of these possibilities, and others not named, have pro's and con's. But that's part of the equation Obama (or McBush, for that matter) must weigh in making his selection.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Our Broken Media, Cont'd., Cont'd., Cont'd.

Daily Kos has this Fox Nutwork drivel from one of their Stepford anchorettes. "Lady," and I'm giving "E.D. Hill" the benefit of the doubt here, Sen. Obama and his wife are American citizens, he's one of 100 members of the United States Senate, and he's the presumptive nominee of the oldest political party in the United States. You? You're a jackass.

Fox Nutwork update: Did you see one of O'Really's producers, Porter "Dingle" Barry, attempting to ambush Bill Moyers? Luckily for those who enjoy stories where the hunter becomes the hunted, it was caught on tape. Wee "Dingle" Barry can't get out of there too fast. A highlight: Moyers says O'Really "isn't a journalist, he's a pugilist."

Our Broken Media, Cont'd., Cont'd.

Fred "Sir Wanksalot" Hiatt, dillweed Iraq War apologist and tread-mark on the reputation of the once-esteemed Washington Post, is at it again this morning. Rising Hegemon handles the appropriate evisceration.

Photo: Sir Wanksalot in "Middle East magical dream" mode.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Our Broken Media, Cont'd.

Vanity Fair's James Wolcott unloads on the "Dean" of Washington pundits David "Broderella" Broder's lofty dismissal of people who think that Bushit and Dead Eye should be impeached and tried before the Senate for lying us into a war in Iraq. While it's too late in the day for that proposal to have any traction, Broderella's response demonstrates what contempt he has for the soldiers and families that have sacrificed so much that he and other inside-the-beltway "villagers" of the national media/punditocracy.

(photo: Broderella strumming a tune on the cabin of Karl Rove's porch)

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Clinton Endorses Obama (At Last)

Sen. Clinton formally suspended her campaign and endorsed Sen. Barack Obama, saying she throws "her full support" behind his candidacy for President. Her speech sought to begin the process of unifying the party as it moves toward the general election, and it succeeded in doing that.

Her speech was in part a redemption of her "non-concession" last Tuesday night, after Obama had clinched the nomination. That speech was largely panned, even by some of her ardent supporters, as ungenerous at best. She now seems ready to campaign for Obama to try to mobilize the voters that supported her behind him. Let's hope so. What divided them as far as policy was concerned was minimal; what divides them both from Sen. Four More Years is huge.

Rethug Values, cont'd.

The former treasurer for the National Republican Congressional Committee embezzled $500,000 from the committee, according to court papers reported in this morning's WaPo (no link). Christopher "Sticky Fingers" Ward authorized numerous diversions of committee funds to pay mortgage costs and a six-figure remodeling of his suburban D.C. home.

Actually, we have some sympathy for Sticky Fingers. We feel that the money was better spent on his home than on Rethuglican campaign activities.

Senate Rethugs Block Climate Change Bill

Senate Democratic leaders fell a dozen votes short of stopping a threatened Rethuglican filibuster on a bill that would have set limits on greenhouse gas emissions to combat global warming. Trotting out a familiar - - and untruthful - - claim, Rethug leader Sen. Mitch "Rhymes with B___" McConnell said that the bill would be equivalent to a tax increase. Democrats disputed McConnell's claims. The bill would have required power plants, refineries and factories to cut carbon dioxide emissions by 71 percent by mid-century.

Remember that when you look at your children and grandchildren and wonder what kind of a world we're going to give them.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Technical Difficulties

The severe thunderstorms and high winds in our area Wednesday resulted in one-half of the Hackwhacker team losing his internet tubes connection.

Here's hoping COMCAST gets my internet tubes cleared out soon. If not, I may have to call internet expert Sen. Ted Stevens for assistance.

ZZZTT. We return you now to your regularly scheduled blog.

Thursday, June 5, 2008


What?! You mean Dumbya misled us about Saddam Hussein and the then-Rethug Congress helped him cover it up, and some Rethug Senators are still trying to cover up!? Why this comes as a complete surprise!! Lead me to the fainting couch, please!!

From Conservative to Rethug: A Lexicon

Every so often we think it's useful to define some of the terms we use when referring to our fellow Americans of a rightward tilt. As we have said in the past, the Hackwhackers have friends and family who count themselves as Republicans. We still love them and we think that's fine, although misguided. After all, Abraham Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt, Dwight Eisenhower, and many other fine Americans past and present have the same party identification.

But over the course of the last 40 or so years, American politics has been degraded by a relentless march downward to the lowest common denominator; it has witnessed a growing "us" vs. "them" dynamic, where both "us" and "them" are Americans. Many on all sides have contributed to this phenomenon, but we believe that a strong case can be made that, beginning in the '60s, there's been such a concerted effort to demonize one side -- liberalism -- to the extent that the word has almost become pejorative. Nixon, Agnew, George Wallace, and the rise of the right under Ronald Reagan and the Bushes were fueled in large measure by caricaturing Democrats/ liberals as soft, elitist, race-mixing, out-of-control tax-and-spenders. In short, when ever they could, they played on peoples' fears rather than their hopes.

During the Dumbya Era, liberals (or progressives, as we prefer) have admittedly taken a great deal of pleasure out of the reversal of fortunes of the "conservative" movement. But we would have to lay on the ridicule non-stop for 30 years in order to match the vitriol that's been, and continues to be, heaped on Democrats/ liberals in the GOP playbook. So with that as a bit of a rationalization, we would like to make some distinctions in the terms we often use here, moving from the sublime to the ridiculous:

Conservatism: A political philosophy based on a belief in limited government and the primacy of the individual. Its ideological forebears are Edmund Burke and Adam Smith. Its modern exemplars are Robert Taft, Barry Goldwater and Ronald Reagan. George "Born 200 Years Too Late" Will is a notable flame-keeper.

Republican: One of two great American political parties, representing (in the past 80 years) the conservative viewpoint.

Rebunglecans: Republicans who have demonstrated incompetence or ineptitude (see Dumbya, "Brownie," George Allen, and neocons Dead Eye Dick, Rummy, Wolfowitz, Kristol, and Feith -- we could go on, but our fingers would fall off). This is often the result of favoring "style" (eg., Dumbya as a "compassionate conservative") vs. "substance," or of a mindset that refuses to be confused by the facts or reality (eg., the neocons).

Rethugs: A growth sector within the Republican Party over the past 20 years, Rethugs are the win-at-all-costs, hypocritical, authoritarian, hyper partisan, divide and conquer cynics that have been in control of the GOP since the mid-80s. Think Karl Rove, the GOP House and Senate leadership ("Man Tan" Boehner, Missy McConnell, etc.), the entire Rupert Murdoch/ Fox News/ NY Post empire, hate talk radio (Michael "Wiener" Savage, for example), and the wingnut blogosphere (the Townhall crazies, Michelle Malkin, Doughy Pantload, etc., etc.). A not-insignificant part of this is the so-called Christian Right, which is neither Christian nor right: Tony Perkins, "Rev." Dobson, "Rev." Hagee, Diamond Pat Robertson, etc.

Well, we've gone on for quite enough. But hopefully this explains the shorthand terms we use and the distinctions we make.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

"What Does Hillary Want?"

That's the question Sen. Clinton posed to her faithful in her New York speech last night after the final primaries.

Many Democrats were hoping that she would give a magnanimous, graceful speech, conceding that Sen. Obama had garnered enough delegates to win the nomination and that it was time to pull the party back together behind him. It would be an important first step to unifying the party, and to removing some suspicion about her own motives. Did she? No, she wants her supporters to flood her website with e-mails telling her what she should do. Riiiight.

Most of the reviews of her speech saw it as an arrogant denial of Obama's win: "terrific, but utterly ungracious," according to Time. Dana Lithwick wrote, "I guess we should give her credit for the fact that her supporters now look sufficiently angry to set small brushfires." Dana Milbank hit the nail on the head with his article in the Washington Post: "In Defeat, Clinton Graciously Pretends to Win." CNN commentator Jeff Toobin spoke of "the deranged narcisism of the Clintons" who don't know when to leave the stage.

So what does Hillary want? She doesn't appear to want to give Sen. Obama any help, and has put him in a box with her leaked willingness to be his running mate. There's open talk of her placing her career - - and her hubby's rehabilitation - - ahead of the interests of the Democratic Party, and it's harder to argue against that with each passing day.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Quote of the Day

"If we do everything right, and we can and we will, I will win in January." - - Rethug Presidential nominee-to-be Sen. John McBrainfart, speaking to supporters. One of the things he might want to get "right" is that the elections are in November, although we're hoping that his supporters wait until January to vote for him. Then they can help set up the chairs at Obama's inauguration.

(photo: "Check me out. . .I'm ready to be sworn in today")

Bushies Distorted Climate Data

The Inspector General for NASA has confirmed allegations that Bush political appointees at NASA systematically distorted and downplayed evidence collected by scientists at that agency of climate change. NASA's IG reports that over at least a two year period, political appointees in the agency's public affairs office "managed the topic of climate change in a manner that reduced, marginalized or mischaracterized climate change science made available to the general public."

Every day that we fail to take action to mitigate the damage done to our environment by greenhouse gases and other human factors, we hand an increasingly difficult task to our children and grandchildren. Another Bushit legacy for future generations.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Cheney Makes Funny at West Virginia Expense

"Dead Eye" Dick Cheney, multimillionaire Rethug plutocrat, was at the National Press Club earlier today when he made a comment about there being Cheneys on both his mother's and father's side of the family. Being the smug turdsqueezer that he is, he couldn't resist making an incest joke involving West Virginia. Let's see how that resonates with the good voters of West Virginia come November.

Bo Diddley Dies

Sad news that rock and roll legend Bo Diddley has died at the age of 79. His distinctive beat and styling of rock and blues laid the groundwork for future artists like the Rolling Stones, the Yardbirds, Bruce Springsteen, and many more. Among the classics Diddley wrote were "I'm A Man," covered by the Yardbirds, and "Who Do You Love." He was a 1987 inductee into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

The Company You Keep

Via Max Blumenthal in the Huffington Post, we learn that the extremist Rev. John Hagee, in a March 2003 sermon, said that the anti-Christ would be gay and "at least partially Jewish, as was Adolph Hitler. . ."

Normally, you'd note this as the continued ravings of a fringe lunatic, but Hagee's endorsement was sought by McSame (who later rejected it), and his upcoming conference will feature Sen. Joe Lieberliar (Party of One - CT) as a speaker. One would think that Lieberliar would shy away from someone who has done such things as call the Catholic Church "the great whore" and who has stated that Hitler was sent by God to drive Jews to Israel. When Lieberliar addresses the Rethug convention (and you know he will), just remember this particular baggage the good senator brings.

Personas Non Grata

We said it yesterday, but it bears repeating and repeating: For our two cents, the following die-hard, Clinton- over- party- over- country hacks should not be allowed anywhere near the Obama campaign once the Magical Inevitable Hillary Machine evaporates: Harold "Icky" Ickes (a man the Rude Pundit says is "desperately in need of a punch in the nuts"), Terry "Even Ickier" McAuliffe, Lanny "Fanny" Davis, and Howard Wolfson (to whom no opprobrium can adequately do justice). Nothing this group of high-profile Clinton enablers could bring to the table would be worth the price to be paid in honor and truth-telling. For these Four Horses Asses of the Apocalypse are fabricators and weasels of the lowest category, and to bring them into the Obama campaign would just as surely tarnish it as would the addition of Hillary herself on the ticket (not gonna happen).

Meanwhile, more rational Clinton backers, like national co-chair and former Iowa Governor Tom Vilsack are saying she should call it quits after tomorrow's primaries.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Quote of the Weekend

"I don't think my ears would fit. There's only so much rock up there." Sen. Obama responding to a reporter's question in South Dakota about whether he would like to be portrayed on Mt. Rushmore.

Bob Dole Goes Postal

It looks like Scott McClellan is former Sen. Bob Dole's new Viagra. McClellan's tell-all book "What Happened" sure got a "rise" out of the famously irascible Dole. We can almost hear wife Elizabeth saying "Viva McClellan!"

Separated At Birth?

The physical similarities between evil mogul Montgomery Burns and political hatchet man Harold "Icky" Ickes are striking. Anyone catching Icky's performances yesterday at the Democrats' Rules and Bylaws Committee weenie roast and the talking heads shows this morning knows that the physical similarities are only the beginning. You get the notion that these angry kamikazes for Clinton - - Icky, Lanny Davis, Howard Wolfson and Terry McAuliffe - - had their West Wing offices picked out earlier this year, and realize now that their dreams of glory are toast.

Sadly,it's not hard to imagine that the Clintons' unstated goal now is to conduct procedural fights up to and during the Democratic convention, and, while outwardly giving support to Obama, working behind the scenes with their kamikazes to make sure that Obama loses in November. Then the Clintons would say "we told you so", and position themselves (yes, themselves) for another run at the Presidency in 2012.

UPDATE: The Atlantic's James Fallows has a similar take here.