You'll Always Find A Republican At The Intersection Of Ignorance And Hypocrisy

Jon Stewart takes on the things Republicans don't actually know and things they (think) they do.  Guest appearances by Rep. Michelle "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann, Weeper of the House John "Mr. Tangerine Man" Boehner, and the execrable felon Oliver North.

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Quote of the Week

"These people are not connected to reality." -- Rethuglican Head Loon Michelle "I See Commies" Bachmann talking about the Obama Administration. Please try not to laugh.

It's true that the Administration is not connected to her "reality", which consists of the nuttiest conspiracy theories (anti-Americans in Congress, the Census takers are going to steal your freedom, etc. etc.) and far-right statements (grab your ammo and guns for the coming revolution) so extreme that she barely got re-elected in her wingnut-majority district in 2008. Lots of individuals that share her "reality" have already been institutionalized.

Quote of the Day

"When your captain's crazy, it's time to find a new ship." -- a conservative Rethuglican congressman commenting on Rep. Michelle "I See Commies" Bachmann's chief of staff quitting after only 9 months on the job. Certainly, Crazy Michelle's nuttiness must have been a factor, as well as her unfamiliarity with the truth.

BTW, today Crazy Michelle is heading up a Fux News-promoted teabagger rally* on the Capitol steps to protest a House bill that would guarantee decent health care for all Americans.
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*which seems to have drawn upwards of 3,500 wingers in what Crazy Michelle called "the Super Bowl" of freedom; more like the Tidy Bowl of Cluelessness. . . [mff snicker mff snicker]. . . oh what the hell, BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Lynch Mob?

The hanging death of a Federal Census worker in Kentucky has raised the question of whether he was the victim of an anti-Government extremist. The word "Fed" was scrawled on Bill Sparkman's chest, according to law enforcement sources, who have told the Census Bureau's regional office that the death is being investigated as a homicide.

If true, and if it is determined that an extremist murdered Mr. Sparkman, blame should go beyond the perpetrator to the poisonous climate created in the past 9 months by the far right -- politicians, pundits, and hate radio personalities alike. In particular, Minnesota Rep. Michelle "I See Commies" Bachmann has been particularly irresponsible and unhinged, saying that she would refuse to fill out her census form and that census data might be used to put Americans in "concentration camps" (no doubt being built by FEMA). She also encouraged her constituents to be "armed and dangerous." It's one of many anti-Government/anti-Obama attacks that the increasingly unhinged right wing has launched since Obama became the 44th President, and it certainly won't be the last.

Bachmann Turns Up Over-Fried

Wingnut extraordinaire Michelle "The Loon" Bachmann (Wingnut-MN) has delusions that the Dems are "after her" because she. . .*cough cough snicker snicker*. . .might become President one day.

"They want to make sure no woman becomes President before a Democrat [sic] woman. They're doing everything they can to sabotage women like Sarah Palin, perhaps women like myself. . ."

Of course, we can't think of two more highly qualified Rethugs than The Loon and Winky You Betcha, and we'd love to see them on the national Rethug ticket together, especially for the Presidential and Vice Presidential debates. The Loon could debate the "Hoot Smalley" bill -- or "Poot Smelly" bill, or. . .nevermind -- and her idea of investigating Congressional Democrats to see how "pro-American" they are, while Winky could talk about her achievements as Governor of Alaska. Ten seconds should be enough time.

Quote of the Day

"What we have to do today is to make a covenant, to slit our wrists. Be blood brothers on this thing." -- Lunatic wingnut Rep. Michelle "The Loon" Bachmann, speaking to a Colorado audience about defeating health care reform.

Please, you go first Ms. Loon.

May Her Wish Come True!

Rethuglican loony Rep. Michelle "Commies In Congress" Bachmann has a new paranoid fantasy: the census, which is taken every 10 years, is a conspiracy to round up wingnuts and send them to FEMA concentration camps, where they will be forced to listen to Barbara Streisand songs and watch reruns of M*A*S*H* all day! Therefore, nutty Michelle says she won't be filling out her census form, and hopes that her constituents follow suit.

What this loony lady fails to realize is that Congressional seats are apportioned according to population, so if her 6th Congressional district voters don't complete their census forms, her Congressional seat might be absorbed by another District, according to the Minneapolis Star-Tribune.

Bwahahahaha! The paranoid chickens come home to roost!

Historian Michele Bachmann Speaks

Cosmic dimbulb and Rethug loon Rep. Michele Bachmann wants us to know what caused the Great Depression: FDR and the "Hoot-Smalley Tariffs!" TPM has the hilarious video.

What a "Hoot!"

Bachmann Overdrive

Rep. Michelle "Anti-American" Bachmann (Loon-MN) is at it again, dog whistling to her fellow loons and listeners of Sean "Manatee" Hannity's radio rant to revolt against the elected government of the United States. Hmmm... last time we checked that was, uh, treason. Apologists want to parse the loon's rant to mean a "peaceful" revolution, but to the mental defectives that take their instructions from the likes of Bachmann and Hannity, it could easily be taken as a call to violence against the government. Tim McVeigh, anyone?

Let's see how long it takes for the "leaders" of her party to rein her in. Once again, as we always caution when it comes to reining in extremist rhetoric by the far right, don't hold your breath.

(Photo: The Minnesota loon, soon -- 2010?-- on the endangered species list.)

Quote of the Day

"You be da man. You be da man!" -- wingnut extraordinaire Rep. Michelle "I See Commies Everywhere" Bachmann, referencing Rethuglican National Committee chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele at the CPAC wing ding yesterday. We haven't determined whether the wingnut Representative proceeded to offer Tin Man some watermelon and fried chicken in exchange for doing a tap dance.

A Truly Lame Duck

Last Friday's disastrous appearance by mega-wingnut Rep. Michelle "I See Anti-Americans" Bachmann on "Hardball" has had the effect of altering what was once a sure thing for her re-election into a toss-up. Her rant included an invitation to the media to investigate Congress and identify "anti-Americans" there. She also said that Sen. Obama had "anti-American" views, which she later lied about, saying her comments were "misconstrued." Uh huh. We can safely assume that anyone who disagrees with this lunatic is "anti-American."

Her diminishing chances seem to be the result of her Minnesota constituents seeing her loony beliefs put in words, and then her lying about what she said -- despite the comments being on video tape. It's even too much for the National Rethuglican Congressional Committee, which yesterday pulled its financial support. Meanwhile, her Democratic opponent, with the improbable but highly Minnesotan name of Elwyn Tinklenberg, has received over $1 million in donations in the past 5 days, and is looking to upset the mega-wingnut on November 4. We can only say to Elwyn, "Go get her, you anti-American!"

(photo: She won't be smiling for long)

Dumb Ass of the Month

The hands-down Hackwhacker Dumb Ass of the Month? Who else but Rethug Rep. Michelle Bachmann (Crackpot-MN), who thinks Congress should be investigated so all the anti-Americans can be flushed out. Watch the clip, listen to her modest proposal, check out her eyes, and then tell me she doesn't belong in a soft room with no sharp objects. More evidence, if any is needed, that the inmates have taken over the Rethuglican Party.