Florida Primary Results Predicted (Humorously, How Else?)

Wonkette previews the Florida primary results (maybe that should be "presults", kinda like "prebuts"):

"...Mitt Romney is going to win, the pollsters say, because the elderly moderate-Republican condo dwellers outnumber the elderly right-wing Cubans and the Truck Nutz rednecks alternating driving around with clenched teeth and clenched sphincters while fuming along to the Rush Limbaugh AM radio program. Yay, democracy.

"Gingrich, a corrupt and delusional millionaire toad who waddles around shrieking into microphones about people being unfair to him, is seen for exactly what he is by 52% of Florida voters: a crook. Romney, a more polite plutocrat, has had accusations about his decades of corporate raiding and job destruction bounce off like raindrops on whatever chemical coating protects his dyed hair."