Thursday, July 31, 2008


Mavericky McBush campaign manager Slick Rick Davis may not have much of a chin, but he sure does have chutzpah. Here's what the chinless wonder said about Sen. Obama's joking about none of the presidents on the currency looking like him:

"Barack Obama has played the race card, and he played it from the bottom of the deck. It's divisive, negative, shameful and wrong."

Davis is a hack's hack. A professional liar, but not a very good one. ("Race card?" He works for the party of "Willie Horton," Jesse Helms and Strom Thurmond, for God's sake.) The McBush campaign is just throwing as much crap at the wall as it possibly can to see what sticks. (Hint: this "playing the race card" slid off the wall immediately.) They desperately want the campaign to be about Obama, and not about the catastrophic failures of the Rethug regime of the past 7 years. It's up to the Obama campaign to keep hammering them on those failures and how Democrats will correct them, and not let this transparent hackery distract voters.

Meanwhile, check out how Mavericky skitters away from CNN/Fox-Lite's John King when pressed about the "race card" tack.

(Photo: if anyone finds Rick Davis' chin, please notify him; there's a reward.)

Oh Lanny, Just STFU

Clinton coat carrier Lanny "The Fanny" Davis is at it again. The newly minted Fux News "analyst" is speaking out in a Wall Street Journal op ed that Sen. Obama should pick Hillary over other female contenders like Governor Kathleen Sebelius of Kansas or Sen. Claire McCaskill of Missouri.

Fanny, give it up already, 'kay? Hillary is not going to be the Democratic veep nominee. Too much baggage, too many clips of her speaking against Obama, too much Bill Gone Wild, too much everything. And Fanny knows it. He just wants Obama to lose in 2008, so that Hillary can claim the nomination in 2012. It's clear. Just stay with the Rethug network where you belong, Fanny. Keep peddling their false "outrage" at why Hillary won't be on the ticket.

"Presumptuous" And All That Crapper

The concerted effort by the graduates of the Karl Rove Camp for Rethug Politics, now working for Mavericky McBush, to paint Obama as an elitist, "celebrity," presumptuous (read: "uppity") pretender is well underway. Will it be eaten up by the voting public? Sadly, No! seems to think so. Given the eagerness of the "moran" media to aid and abet Mavericky McBush and his Rovian accolytes in this effort, we're too starting to think, sadly, yes.

(h/t's to Sadly, No! and Rising Hegemon)

(Photo: ABC's Jake "Crapper" Tapper, looks "uppity" his ass to discover he has no soul)

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

About That McSame Ad. . .

The McSame ad that makes the false claim that Obama didn't want to visit with wounded vets has been running on cable news outlets for the past 3 days, but was only running on stations in Denver and D.C. Obviously, the McSame campaign fed it to the media to get some free air time, and it worked. But there's been some fact checking, and McStraightTalk doesn't look so pure any more.

He's also letting his "great guy" image slip, looking far more tense and angry now that he's stuck in the low 40s. His Rovian campaign team (Herr Schmidt and others) are returning to the slime book that has served Rethug presidential candidates for so many years. "Say anything to win; if called on a lie, deny and deny." We'll see how long St. John McStraightTalk can fool people.

No Tears For Ted

Lest you have any sympathies for corrupt old Sen. Ted "Internet Tubes" Stevens, read this op-ed piece by Michael Crowley. Stevens thought he was Alaska; he's also one mean SOB.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Vote Suppression, Rethug Style

Ah yes. With Democrats far outdistancing Rethugs in voter registration, Rethugs have to resort to challenging or otherwise suppressing the Democratic vote. They know they have no chance if Democrats turn out and vote in number. Vote suppression seemed to work in Ohio in 2004, and now Virginia Rethugs are trying it.

It's also reminiscent of what the Bushit Assministration's Justice Department was up to when they were expecting U.S. Attorneys to create "voter fraud" cases to reduce the Democratic turn out. Rethug values on parade.

Rethuglican Down "The Tubes"?

Add Alaska Senator Ted "Internet Tubes" Stevens to the list of Rethug politicians that will be taking the perp walk soon. Stevens was indicted by a Federal grand jury today on seven counts of making false statements that concealed payoffs from Veco Energy in the form of improvements to his home. Hey, he's just being a Rethuglican; is that a crime?

Wanker of the Week

To borrow from WaPo thumbsucker (and yet another "liberal", see below), "I know that Richard Cohen is a completely idiotic political columnist. But I just am not sure he knows what an empty package he is." Check out his latest drivel to understand why Fred Hiatt must be getting a tingle up his leg this morning, and why he gets our "Wanker of the Week" citation.

(Photo: the dumbest ass in the world)

"Liberal" Media, Indeed

George Mason University's Center for Media and Public Affairs, which has tracked election coverage for several decades, has issued a study proving what we already knew: the "main stream" broadcast media (NBC, CBS, and ABC) has been much more negative in its reporting on Barack Obama than St. John McBarbecue in the 6 weeks since the head-to-head- match up began. Fox (aka GOP-TV) was not included in the study since it's not a credible news organization. The results? Reporting on Obama was 78% negative , while reporting on St. John was 57% negative.

So, the next time we hear how biased the "liberal" media is, we have a steaming cup to offer you.

(h/t to Crooks and Liars)

Monday, July 28, 2008

Quote of the Day

Another McSame theme bites the dust:

"I used to say that Barack Obama raises taxes and John McCain cuts them. I was convinced. I stand corrected." McSame domestic policy advisor Douglas Holtz-Eakin. Via the Atlantic's Marc Ambinder.

Ouch! Dissention in the McMavericky campaign? Why not? Everything else is going so well.

McSame's Gas Production

As noted in today's earlier post, John McBush has been the beneficiary of a cash infusion from oil company executives who LOVE his mavericky position to let them drill wherever the hell they want offshore, and to expand their huge profits even more (exploration cost pass-throughs and tax write-offs) without producing an additional drop of oil for years.

But a little something called "supply and demand" has intruded on McBush's magical straight-talk world: gas prices are down below $4.00 per gallon, and we haven't drilled a single offshore well in the past month or so. Imagine that! Well, this may explain it for McEconomist.

The Tennessee Shooter? It's a Wingnut

Huffington Post is reporting that Jim D. Adkisson, the man charged in the fatal shootings this weekend at the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist Church in Knoxville, is a wingnut who was disturbed by the church's "liberal" policies. As the story unfolds, it will be interesting to see from where Adkisson got his "inspiration": the pulpit, hate radio, and/or the little voice in his head.

Roving McBush

The noxious fumes of Turdblossom protege and McBush campaign chief Steve "Sack O' " Schmidt's presence are now being smelled.

First, can there be any doubt that Herr Schmidt was behind these McBush formulations: "I'm not prepared to see the sacrifice of so many brave young Americans lost because Senator Obama just views this [Iraq] war as another political issue with which he can change positions" and "Senator Obama would rather lose a war in order to win a political campaign." Such statements drew a sharp rebuke from Republican Senator Chuck Hagel (R-NE), who said McBush was "treading on some very thin ground here when he impugns motives..." An unnamed Rethug strategist also said such language was an indicator that the McBush campaign was "not happy with where they are and they're lashing out."

Second, needing an infusion of cash to his floundering campaign, McBush flip-flopped on his long-held opposition to offshore oil drilling and was handsomely rewarded by Big Oil. In the last half of June, after the flip-flop, McBush got $1.1 million in contributions from oil and gas industry executives. As David Donnelly of the non-partisan Public Campaign Action Fund put it, "This is a case study of how a candidate can change a policy position in the interest of raising money."

Isn't it wonderful to have the lessons of the great moralist, Karl Rove, brought to bear in St. John McBush's campaign?!

Rethug Police Blotter, Police Edition

Sheriff Michael Carona, a once up-and-coming Rethug and sheriff of Orange County, California, was indicted last October, charged with mail fraud and corruption. The sheriff, who met with Karl "Turdblossom" Rove to discuss his future in Orange County Rethug politics before the inconvenient truth of his inner rot became known, is now trying to keep Federal prosecutors from introducing to a future jury tapes and other evidence of his kickbacks, sexual misconduct and other ethical problems. In one incident, a cellphone accidentally dialed an answering machine while the married sheriff was having sex with a female deputy in a county vehicle (his nickname for his privates - "The Little Sheriff" - no doubt was well chosen). Oh, the sheriff also had a mistress.

Carona's indictment also includes charges he received kickbacks in the form of Cartier watches, a $2,500 custom suit, trips to Las Vegas, Lake Tahoe and Cabo San Lucas.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

MSNBC Finds Lindsey Graham In The Closet

Love the "Candidate Brain Trusts" item on MSNBC (courtesy of Wonkette), which says that "Lindsey Graham is a U.S. senator from South Carolina and one of McCain's closet friends in that chamber." Along, no doubt, with Rethug Senators Larry "Wide Stance" Craig and Mitch "Missy" McConnell.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. . . .

McSame: "I Know How To Catch Bin Laden"

In an interview with CNN, Sen. John McStraightTalk stated that "I know how to catch bin Laden." Well, if you do, why keep our intelligence and military forces in the dark, McJamesBond? We're sure they'd love to hear your ideas ("first, I'd dress like one of those A-rabs and infiltrate their harems. . .uh wait, lemme think about that")

So if McStraightTalk knows how to catch bin Laden, but doesn't want to get specific, is he more interested in winning an election than in protecting U.S. citizens and in capturing the world's worst terrorist?

At The Fox Business Network, Business Is Bad

The WaPo reports that the Fox Business Network's July Nielsen numbers are somewhat south of awful.

What on earth is the "Fox Business Network" you ask? That's the apparent problem: on average, only 8,000 (not a misprint) viewers tune in to the Murdock channel during the day, and only 20,000 tune in during prime time. (Here we pause for a moment of raucous laughter). That's like the whole population of Traill County, North Dakota watching during the day! Most excellent!

In contrast, CNBC draws numbers like 284,000 during the day, and 191,000 during prime time. FBN was launched with some fanfare last October, but has barely been noticed; we're betting the Nielsen numbers for Fox are the result of Murdock ordering his employees to tune in, or be forced to shower with Bill "Loofah" O'Liely.

(photo: Fox Network's Murdock contemplating showering with O'Liely)

"Did I Say 100 Years? I Meant 16 Months"

Having been caught flatfooted by Iraqi Prime Minister Maliki's statement essentially endorsing Sen. Obama's 16-month troop withdrawal timeframe, Sen. St. John McFlipper has now said that a 16 month timeframe is "a pretty good timetable." With the freely-elected Iraqi government on record as supporting troop withdrawal sooner rather than later, McFlipper had no choice, except to call for Iraq becoming a permanent colony of the U.S. (he'll leave that to neocon nutbag Charles Kraphammer).

So let's see, McFlipper's trimmed his positions on immigration and tax breaks for the wealthy to please the Rethuglican base, and now he's trimming his position on the Iraq War. His last remaining tactic is to issue schoolyard taunts at his Democratic opponent to "say the surge succeeded. . I dare ya! Nyah, nyah!" Most Americans have moved on, have recognized Iraq as a costly blunder and distraction, and are looking at the issue of which candidate can wrap up the mess in Mess o' Potamia. It's not McStraightTalk.

Friday, July 25, 2008

News Item: McCranky To Meet With Dalai Lama

Fresh off its tour of a grocery market and German sausage store in Ohio, the McCranky campaign is reporting that the Senator is planning to meet with the Dalai Lama this evening, presumably to share their thoughts on world peace. It should be a short meeting.

McCranky would be well advised not to sing, "Bomb, bomb, bomb. . .bomb, bomb Iran" to the Dalai Lama.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Another Fine Day For America's "Journalists"

In another sad commentary on the state of our mainstream media, reporters covering Sen. Obama's visit to Jerusalem yesterday were interrupted by frantic messages from their editors back in the U.S. that right wing blogger Matt Drudge had described a "mob scene" at the Wailing Wall. Of course, nothing of the sort happened.

Too many of these mainstream press morons are letting Drudge be their assignment editor and guru. Enough. Do your own checking, think for yourselves, and make yourselves worthy of the first amendment.

Give This Man A Seeing Eye Dog

Right wing pundit Robert "Prince of Darkness" Novak was cited yesterday in D.C. for hitting a man on a bicycle with his Corvette convertable. Thankfully, the man escaped with minor injuries. Novak claims that he "didn't see the man" who was momentarily sprawled across the passenger side windshield.

Can't someone take away this wingnut's toys before he really hurts someone?

McSame's Growing Desperation

Check out the Huffington Post's collection of images from McSame's past week. Every one a giggler, from his ride in the golf cart with Poppy Bush to his press conference in a grocery store's cheese aisle. Bwahahahaha.

His campaign is doing everything they can to draw attention away from Sen. Obama's impressive foreign tour, including making outrageous statements. An example: McSame's statement that Obama would rather win an election than win a war in Iraq. A video clip of that statement is here; notice the creepy grin that he has after he makes the statement (about 29 seconds in). It all reeks of desperation.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Obama in Berlin

There's no reason to think it will happen, but wouldn't it be the ultimate chill-inspiring picture if Caroline Kennedy shows up on stage with Obama in Berlin? The crowd would go NUTS.

So Long, Pardner

It's well known that Dumbya bought the Crawford, TX ranch right around the time that he first ran for President in 2000. A Ronnie-like ranch, where Dumbya could be photo-opped clearing brush and performing other manly chores, was thought to be the ticket for getting the mainstream media to buy into the fiction of Kennebunkport Chimpy as a regular guy that you could have a beer with. It worked.

Now, however, with Dumbya counting down his remaining days as Preznit, the Crawford ranch is expendable as a backdrop. It looks like he's planning on his twilight years being spent in the more urban environment of Dallas.

"The Legacy of George W. Bush"

Hackwhackers Tokyo Bureau Chief Brian brings this photo collection to our attention, documenting the preznitcy of our codpieced Commando-in-Chief. How are we coming along on that George W. Bush Sewage Treatment Plant and memorial flush?

Holy Joe's Pact With Evil

As we noted yesterday, Sen. Joe Lieberloser (Likud-CT) decided to appear at the "Christian Zionist" wank-fest in D.C., despite Sen. St. John Barbeque McSame's disavowal of nutbag host Pastor John "Hater" Hagee.

Lieberloser was quoted as saying that Hagee's support for Israel "is so much more important" than inflammatory comments made about Jews (!!) and Catholics. Hagee is on record as believing that an end-of-time scenario requires that Jews return to Israel and to convert to Christianity; he's also called the Roman Catholic church "a whore." It should be clear to everyone by now that Lieberloser's priorities are 1) himself and 2) Israel. Nothing else counts.


Sen. St. John Barbeque McSame has said in the past that he doesn't have a good grasp on economics. That was evident when he recently declared that Preznit Chimpy was responsible for the $10 drop in oil prices after he lifted the ban on offshore drilling a few days ago.

Not so fast, McMaverick. It takes more than a few days to determine the most promising field for exploration, to construct and tow the massive drilling platform out to sea and erect it, to then get crude out of the crust (assuming you're drilling in the right place), to transfer the crude to on-shore refineries, to ship the refined product to market, and for the market to reflect the meager increase. It's more like several years, at best.

Actually, McSame, gasoline consumption is also down by 2% over last year, which may account for the drop in prices. But then, you thought Iraq and Pakistan shared a border, and that Social Security is "a disgrace." Keep embracing Dumbya, however. That's a smart move.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Lieberloser's Woes

The Huffington Post reports that McSame best friend forever Sen. Joe Lieberloser (Likud - CT) is far less popular among Jewish voters than Sen. Barack Obama. Lieberloser is viewed favorably by only 37 percent, versus 60 percent for Obama, while 48 percent view Lieberloser unfavorably, versus 34 percent for Obama.

Speaking of Lieberloser, he's scheduled to address Pastor John "Hater" Hagee's "Christian Zionist" wank-fest this week. The pastor is the guy who called the Catholic Church a "whore" and said that God caused Hitler to launch the Holocaust so that Jews would establish Israel. Let's see how his poll numbers do after that appearance.

UPDATE: Glenn Greenwald has more on Lieberloser's embrace of Hagee.

(photo: Lieberloser and McSame contemplate a passionate kiss)

Monday, July 21, 2008

As Seen Around the Internet Tubes

The WaPo's Pollution

Some years ago, residents of the Washington, DC area had a clear choice between progressive and conservative newspapers: the Washington Post and the Washington Times (and earlier, the Evening Star), respectively. Sadly, over time, the WaPo has shifted well to the right under the direction of neocon editor Fred "Right Turn" Hiatt. Asshat columnist Michael Gerson, former Bushie speechwriter, is a prime example of how their op-ed page has become a platform for numerous wingut pundits.

Sunday's op-ed column by Gerson blames environmentalists for the lack of progress in environmental protection, not corporate polluters or their enablers in the Bush Assministration (see EPA). As John Cole points out, it's like blaming doctors for not working hard enough with the tobacco companies in fighting cancer. This is what passes for "conservative" thought these days. Shame on the WaPo.

"We're F*cked"

In a revealing comment on Prime Minister Maliki's statement endorsing Sen. Obama's withdrawal timeframe, a McSame advisor said the voters "don't care about Iraqi leaders," only what the military says. Unfortunately for McSame, who wants permanent U.S. bases there, the Iraqi leaders were elected by the Iraqi people. It wasn't long ago that McSame was stating that we should leave Iraq if asked by their democratically-elected government. It's clear that the vast majority of Iraqis don't want permanent U.S. military bases on Iraqi soil, and it will be an issue in their upcoming parliamentary elections.

Even more revealing was the comment by a frequent McSame foreign policy advisor, reacting to the Iraqi leader's desire for a withdrawal timetable: "We're f*cked."

Sunday, July 20, 2008

A Savage Weiner

Hate radio uber-wingnut Michael (real name: Weiner) Savage thinks autism is "a fraud, a racket". He made his comments on his hate radio show on July 16. The Weiner's advice to parents with children who have this fraudulent condition? To paraphrase: if they act like fools, tell them they're fools like my daddy told me when I acted foolish.

Daddy Weiner, where are you? You need to tell "little Weiner" he's a fool. And while you're at it, tell the people who syndicate his brand of toxic talk that they're even bigger fools for keeping this rancid Weiner on the air.

(Photo: The savage Michael Weiner, missing only the police blotter information at the bottom of the picture.)

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Bushies Pull A Homer

The Bushie press office accidentally sent out an e-mail to its entire address list with an article attached: "Iraqi PM backs Obama troop exit plan." Prime Minister Maliki was reported by Reuters to endorse Sen. Obama's goal of 16 months for the withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq, saying "that, we think, would be the right timeframe for a withdrawal, with the possibility of slight changes."

Nothing like drawing attention to the inanity of Dumbya's "we'll stay as long as we want" strategery, supported by St. John McSame, but which seems to have been rejected by the Iraqis. Hee hee.

Department of Unintentional Humor

From Sen. Larry "Wide Stance" Craig, speaking of our dependence on foreign oil:

"They have us by the gas nozzle."

Such a naughty boy.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Time We Didn't Have To Waste

The WaPo has an article, "Warming Is Major Threat To Humans, EPA Warns," that is simply one more confirmation of the Bush Assministration's criminal negligence when it comes to acting on global warming. Just days after EPA (under pressure from the White House) decided it would not issue regulations on greenhouse gas emissions, the EPA reported "it is very likely" that more will die from heat waves, hurricanes and pathogens resulting from warming. Every section of the country would be affected. Meanwhile every day that is lost means more greenhouse gas emissions as we get closer to the tipping point (if it hasn't already been reached). Another "legacy" for Chimpy.

Late Entry

We may have a last-minute contender for the "Wanker of the Week" award: Charles "Kraphammer." The neo-con master of the bon mot thinks Obama's being "uppity" again by daring to want to speak at the Brandenburg Gate! Kraphammer's WaPo op/ed is full of the ad hominem attacks that we've come to expect from the Rethugs and their water carriers like Kraphammer. Kraphammer! You're supposed to be dealing in the marketplace of ideas! Leave the ad hominem attacks to us!

By sheer volume of fudge, we must give Kraphammer the award this week (sorry, "Bipartisan!").

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Wanker of the Week

Yes, it's our favorite Washington gas bag, David "Bipartisan" Broder, with this morning's column, "Listening to the Governors." The dean of beltway thumbsuckers uses his column to extol the wisdom of governors, especially "the lessons of bipartisanship." Then, at the end, comes this clinker that wins him the trophy:

"Both John McCain and Barack Obama have their roots in a Congress suffering from massive public disdain. They need to listen to governors - and learn."

Fact check: Years in Congress - St. John McBush (26); Barack Obama (4). Anyone with even a passing grasp on reality knows Obama spent most of his adult life as a community organizer and later as an Illinois State Senator (we're sure he did a lot of listening to the Governor of Illinois at the time).

(Photo: Broder using his own gas to effect "lift off.")

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

"Appeasing" Iran

You may recall back in May, when Preznit Dumbya, speaking to the Israeli Knesset, tried to link Sen. Obama to the appeasers of Hitler because Obama had said that he would use diplomacy to deal with the Iranian nuclear threat? Can someone find that tape and please erase it so Dumbya and St. John McBush of Barbecue won't be embarrassed? Oh, right, nothing embarrasses them!

It seems the Assiministration is reversing its own bonehead no-talk policy and is sending Undersecretary of State William Burns to meet with Iranian officials in Geneva -- without preconditions. This leaves the Rethugs flapping and floundering for some other epithet to tar Sen. Obama with. We're sure they'll come up with some nonsense; they always do.

(Photo: Henny Dumbya speaking to the Knesset: "Take my policy on Iran... please!")

Chimpy Continues To Leak On The Constitution

The most incompetent, corrupt Preznit in U.S. history continues to stonewall on the leak of CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity, in violation of Federal law. Dumbya's already commuted the sentence of Scooter Libby (and will no doubt pardon him in 2009 before he slinks away). His assertion of "executive privilege" in not allowing Attorney General Mukasey to testify in the scandal is a transparent attempt to cover his and Dirty Dick's complicity in outing Ms. Plame, whose husband had the guts to call Bushit out on his State of the Union lie about Iraq seeking uranium from Niger. The lie was part and parcel of the Assministration's campaign to drum up support for invading Iraq, despite the fact that Iraq was not involved in the terrorist attacks on 9-11. Chimpy's main concern now is that he not be fingered as the initiator of the leak; the fact that bin Laden remains at large is of little concern to him.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

This Just In. . .

Fux News resident basset hound Brit "Full of It" Hume is stepping down at the end of the year from the Rethug channel to assume a "senior statesman" - - pause for snickering - - role. That'll mean less memorization of Rethuglican National Committee talking points for Full of It.

No doubt he'll find some part time employment as a Rethug spinner/consultant/"expert" for which he'll be extravagantly overpaid.

Oh My

A new international advertising poster for the State of South Carolina proclaims "South Carolina Is So Gay." The poster's appearing in London, as well as Atlanta, Boston, Las Vegas, New Orleans and Washington, DC.

Yeah, just ask Rethug Sen. Lindsay Graham, he'll tell you. Privately, of course.

Kiss kiss.

Our Broken Media, Cont'd.

It's been clear for a while that Time's Mark "Drudge Rules Our World" Halperin has been in the tank for Sen. John Barbeque McSame. Last week, after the McSame campaign self-destructed over Phil Gramm's Americans are "whiners" statement, McSame's Social Security is "a disgrace", etc., Halperin declared the week was "won" by McSame. Sure, and the Nationals won the World Series last year.

Now, he's pushing McSame's late recognition that there might, just might, be a problem in Afghanistan/Pakistan that could use some extra troops. At the same time, Halperin pretends that Sen. Obama is just now shifting his position in recognition of that fact. Despite the public record to the contrary. Asshat.

Meanwhile, In Af-going-istan. . .

Sen. Obama delivered an important foreign policy speech today in which he pointed to the worsening situation in Afghanistan (where the Taliban/al Qaeda is growing in strength). Speaking of Dumbya's Iraq adventure, Obama said:

"This war distracts us from every threat that we face and so many opportunities we could seize. This war diminishes our security, our standing in the world, our military, our ecomomy, and the resources that we need to confront the challenges of the 21st century."

Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman Admiral Mike Mullen has recently said that additional combat brigades are needed in Afghanistan to counter a resurgent Taliban and their al Qaeda allies. The needed combat brigades are tied down in Iraq - - and are suffering from fatigue after multiple "stop loss" tours of duty. Chimpy's brilliant strategery in operation.

(photo: Undercover Chimpy: "They caught me when ah asked for some bacon on mah pulao, heh heh. I jes did what Dick told me to do")

Monday, July 14, 2008

Where's The McLovin'?

Fred Hiatt must have been on a break: quote from today's WaPo editorial (no link), "McCainAnd Math":

"Sen. John McCain says that President McCain would balance the federal budget by 2013. It's not credible."

Looks like the "Straight Talk Express" has a flat.

Dumbya Lifts Offshore Drilling Ban

In a transparent political stunt, Dumbya announced today that he's lifting the executive order banning offshore oil drilling, a ban in effect since the days of former president George H.W. "Poppy" Bush. Of course, this does nothing to relieve gas prices (it would take 7 years or more for any oil found today to reach consumers). It would do nothing but add to the already huge, un-drilled undersea plots (68 million acres) already leased by Big Oil. It obviously does nothing to decrease our dependence on oil. It's only a partisan gimmick intended to "pressure" Congress to enact legislation to allow offshore drilling, put some money in Big Oil's pockets, and hopefully score some points for St. John McBush and beleaguered Rethugs in Congress who are trying to find anything that will distract voters from connecting the dots with the failed Rethug policies of the last 7 years.

In other words, it's the domestic policy equivalent of invading Iraq to fight al-Qaeda. Let's sit back now and watch the main stream media pronounce this a bold, decisive move.

"Tasteless and Offensive"

The July 21 cover of the New Yorker Magazine shows a cartoon of Barack and Michelle Obama fist-bumping in the Oval Office, but what's offensive about the cartoon is the fact that he's dressed as a Muslim, she's dressed as a '60s Black Nationalist with a semiautomatic rifle slung over her shoulder, and they're standing in front of a fireplace burning the American flag with a picture of bin Laden over the mantlepiece. Nice.

Of course, the New Yorker calls the cartoon a satire, and that the article inside the magazine is favorable to the Obamas. But how many people walking past magazine racks and newstands will see the cartoon, never read the article, and form a different opinion? Millions perhaps, and that's the problem. Also, shouldn't the subjects of the satire be the wingnuts who are spreading the false rumors, not the Obamas?

The Obama campaign called the cover "tasteless and offensive." (To their credit, the McSame campaign agreed). "Stupid" would be an additional adjective that we'd choose.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Dummer Than A Hummer

OK. Once you've had a chance to read "Hummer We Need Thee" by Matthew "Not Stiff As" DeBord, please take this quick quiz:
Matthew is
a) a Rethug
b) a sociopath
c) compensating for his "mini-me"
d) a "moran"
e) all of the above

Saturday, July 12, 2008

The Snowman Melteth, RIP

He was 53. Condolences to his family; he served Dumbya well. Enough said.

A Proper Burial

One of the Bushit Assministration's tactics in trying to minimize the human costs of the war in Iraq was to limit media coverage of burials of the fallen at Arlington National Cemetery. Last month, Lisa Gray, the public affairs director for the cemetery was fired for trying to accomodate the wishes of families for the media to cover the burials of their fallen heroes. The Bushies, of course, would rather the public not see the funerals or the grief.

The Army Department has an investigation into the firing of Ms. Gray. We'll see where that goes, but it won't compensate for the lives lost in Dumbya's war of vengeance and hubris.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Wiener Shit-zel

So as not to contrast with the abysmal view that Germans have of Dumbya, Bushit Assministration wienies are pressuring the German government to disallow Sen. Obama from speaking to an expected monster crowd at the Brandenburg Gate in Berlin later this summer. Such an event also would obviously be to the disadvantage of Rethug Sen. McSame, who represents more of the same Bushit foreign policy.

We'll see where this goes, but we would think that the German government would want to allow the address, given Obama's huge popularity among Germans. It would also be a nice way of responding to Dumbya's disrespectful shoulder massage of Chancellor Merkel.

Mr. Responsibility

It comes as no surprise that Preznit Chimpy won't be issuing any regulations to control greenhouse gas emissions before his term of office mercifully ends in January 2009.

Despite a ruling from the Supreme Court last year that ordered the EPA to determine whether greenhouse gas emissions were harming human health and welfare, the Bushies are delaying any action on greenhouse gas control regulations until Chimpy exits the Oval Office. Along with the Dickster's editing of Congressional testimony to downplay the impacts of global warming, this ranks up there in the annals of this Assministration's malignant attitude toward the environment, and its own citizens' health.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Gramm: "A Nation of Whiners"

Former Rethug Senator and current McBush "economix" guru Phil Gramm has some advice for Americans: "Stop whining! This is only a mental recession!" Yes, that's the substance of what moneybags Phil told the Washington Moonie Times. Gramm, whose banking deregulation obsession played a large part in the current mortgage lending fiasco, would expect to be at the top of the list for Treasury Secretary in a McBush assministration, where he could be expected to extend his "Let them eat cake" social darwinist philosophy to all of us whiners.

(Photo: Gramm and McBush, who seems to be about to whine - or shart.)

Fox Nutwork's "Photoshop of Horrors"

Hats off to Vanity Fair for giving us this wonderful piece of photoshopping the Fox Nutwork hacks (NOTE: to get the photos started, click in the "Politics and Power" header). You may recall Fox's lame effort to smear NYT reporters Steven Reddicliffe and Jacques Steinberg by photoshopping their images on a "Fox and Friends" barfcast. We like Hannity's makeover best, although the Brit Hume makeover gives him a certain elfin look that complements his dry wit.

Today's Quiz

Who said:

"...the diplomatic and economic approach to dealing with Iran - and trying to get the Iranian government to change its policies - is the strategy and is the approach that continues to dominate."

A. "Arch-appeaser" Barack Obama
B. "Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran" St. John McCain
C. Secretary of Defense Robert Gates
D. Toby Keith

The answer (we know you already guessed it!) is "C," SecDef Robert Gates, one of the few adults in the Bush Assministration (who, it's been rumored, may be asked to stay on in an Obama Administration). You may also be guessing that it's the same position Barack Obama has taken toward Iran - and you'd be right. (If, however, you guessed Toby Keith, "you might NOT be a redneck!")

So, the next time some hack from the Rethug National Committee, its media outlet (the Fox Nutwork), or the McBush campaign tries to caricature Obama as an Iran appeaser, remember who the adults are in the discussion.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Joke of the Week

"Maybe that's a way of killing them."-- St. John McBush, yesterday in Pittsburgh, commenting on a jump in U.S. exports to Iran, especially cigarettes.

St. John is establishing himself as a gold mine of humor, especially on Iran. Who says the man doesn't have the temperament to be President?!

(By the way, the way the Associated Press headlined the story was "Wife Pokes McCain in the Back," choosing to bury the real story - that McCain had made another dumb, unpresidential joke about Iran. "Liberal media" my ass!)

Dead Eye's Aim On The Environment

Dead Eye Dick Cheney might not be much of a quail hunter, but the mighty Dickster can zero in on environmental testimony that conflicts with his partisan BS. So says former senior EPA offical Jason Burnett, who said that Cheney and his staff edited Congressional testimony to play down the scientific evidence of global warming. Never let science interfere with politics!

Department of Extreme Irony

"This is a hard decision for me personally because frankly I don't like him. I feel like he's an elitist. . ." -- Businesswoman Lynn Forester de Rothschild, on whether she'll raise funds for Sen. Obama.

de Rothschild was a Clinton "Hillraiser" who raised at least $100,000 for Sen. Clinton's campaign. Let's see: big money fundraiser with a famous aristocratic name. But not elitist herself. Maybe she meant to say "uppity" instead of "an elitist."

McBush Touches Third Rail, Survives

The Atlantic's Matt Iglesias picked up on this bit of wisdom from Sen. McBush about Social Security:

"Americans have got to understand that we are paying present-day retirees with the taxes paid by young workers in America today. And that's a disgrace."

We suppose McBush, who has been covered by the Federal retirement system (Navy and Senate) for most of his life and who married into wealth, has not had much interest in, or knowledge of, Social Security. Our taxes went to pay for our parents' Social Security, and we think that's the honorable thing, considering all that the previous generation did. The social compact between generations says that the generations help each other. Amazing that he doesn't understand that, but then he's OK with staying in Iraq indefinitely too.

And the reaction from the "liberal" media?
*crickets chirping*

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Confusion Reigns Mainly on McSame

Confusion reigns for McSame's game. And the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain. Oops, sorry got carried away.

There seems to be some confusion on the Straight Bull Express these days, what with the exit of Rick Davis as McSame's campaign manager, and Karl Rove protege Steve Schmidt taking over. Hopefully they'll get it figured out no earlier than November 5.

A Dumbya Abroad

Just a day or so after Dumbya hailed Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper by calling out, "Yo, Harper!", the White House press kit distributed to reporters covering the G8 Summit in Japan was found to contain some embarrassing words about Italy and Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi. The Berlusconi bio, for example, called him one of the "most controversial leaders in the history of a country known for government corruption and vice." I guess you'd have to give them some credit for not adding, "... and exporting the Mafia to America."

An apology was issued forthwith by the White House -- for the botched press information, not for the incompetence of Dumbya and his Bushies.

(Image: Apologies to Alfred E. Neuman)

Here's Your Hat, What's Your Hurry?

The Iraqi government is suggesting a short term pact with the U.S. that would call for troop reductions, a clear departure from the Bushit Assministration's desire for a long-term military presence in Iraq. The idea was brought up by Iraqi Prime Minister Maliki in a security meeting with Arab ambassadors. Establishing a timetable for U.S. troop withdrawal is widely popular among the Shiite majority, not to mention the U.S. public. It is essentially the "as they stand up, we'll stand down" mantra that the Assministration peddled years ago, before abandoning it in favor of a "long-term" presence in the oil-rich country.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Veepstakes Update

Sen. Jim Webb issued his Shermanesque press release today, saying he would not be a candidate for Vice President. Guess that means you can scratch him off our earlier list of possible Obama running mates. Several others on the list have taken themselves out of contention (Strickland and Rendell) and another is probably DOA after the latest media Mount Molehill (Clark).

One drops off, another joins the speculation: former House Majority Leader Rep. Richard Gephardt of Missouri.

Fuxing Around

Think Progress has the details of the lame attempt last week by the Fux News channel to smear two New York Times journalists who had written an article that the Fuxers had deemed unfavorable. By digitally altering their photos, the Fuxers degraded their appearance. Is Fux hiring directly from the 6th grade?

Stay classy, wingers!

McBush Economix

This is a fine example of the oxymoron "McBush economics," economics being something St. John McBush admits he doesn't know much about. Let's see how much the "MSM" critiques this "plan," which amounts to extracting moonbeams from cucumbers...

Jesse Helms

Former Sen. Jesse Helms (Rethug-NC) died July 4. As we know, it's improper to say bad things about the dead (except when others can say them for you -- h/t Sadly, No!):

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." -- Mark Twain

We'll let this speak for us as well.

Deja Boom

Another day, another massive bombing in Afghanistan, this time near the Indian Embassy in Kabul. The NY Times is reporting at least 40 killed and 140 injured in the blast. This follows the attack in Islamabad, Pakistan the day earlier, which targeted the Danish Embassy. It's beginning to look like Baghdad, 2007.

In last week's press conference, a very concerned Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman Admiral Mullen said that more troops were needed in Afghanistan to address the Taliban insurgency. With our combat brigades tied down in Iraq, that will be a tall order, as the Pentagon has informed Dumbya. . . .who is probably busy thinking about an attack on Iran.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Happy Fourth of July!

As we prepare for a daughter visit and a wedding, Hackwhackers wishes you all a safe and happy Fourth of July!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Bush Surveys Damage Wrought By His Presiduncy

Brian, our Tokyo Bureau Chief, is earning his salary this week! Here's the Onion's take on a Bush "farewell tour" to survey the damage done to America

(Not) The King's Engrish

Thanks to our Tokyo Bureau Chief, Brian, we've found one of the most hilarious sites we've ever seen:! Thousands of examples of mangled English in all forms (suggestion: start with the "Signs/Posters" category as an appetizer; remember to click on images to enlarge them!)! A welcome relief from the more "serious humor" of politics.

Chippin' at the Mansion of Love

Last August, Mississippi Rethug Congressman Chip "Double Dip" Pickering announced he wasn't going to run for reelection in order to -- all together now -- spend more time with his family. Well, seems he won't be needing so much time after all, since, as Wonkette reports, he's divorcing his wife. We won't go into the lurid details, but it involves at least two other women (hence "Double Dip"). Well, whaddaya know! An oddity in Rethug circles: a hetero cheater! Chip comes from fine Mississippi bloodlines -- his father is infamous racist retired federal judge Charles Pickering, often on Rethug short lists for Supreme Court vacancies.

(Photo: "Double Dip" with soon-to-be-ex-wife Leisha)

Temper, Temper (Again)!

Since you won't see it on teevee or the "main stream media," be sure not to miss this revealing piece about a McBush flare up during his trip to Colombia. Seems he's still a little touchy about people with the temerity to ask what his honorable, heroic war record has to do with qualifications to be commander-in-chief. Sens. Lindsey "Not a Cracker" Graham and Joe Lieberliar had to step in to cool McBush down before he showed the world his fine Presidential temperament.


We're into our fourth day of the faux outrage over Gen. Wesley Clark's response to a loaded question by CBS' Bob Schieffer that flying a jet and getting shot down doesn't qualify you for the Presidency. He had prefaced that response by profusely praising McSame's patriotism and service as a Navy pilot, but the mainstream media had its soundbite and they've twisted it but good.

Davis Rees has a good take on qualifications for various positions in today's Huffington Post. We'd suggest that most of the mainstream media is underqualified for the jobs that they do if they can't see that what General Clark said didn't "call into question the military service" of McSame. Clark, a highly decorated Vietnam vet himself, would be the last person to do so. But it's to the economic advantage of the media to stir up "controversy" in every comment, and to magnify "gaffes". The American public deserves better.

Rove Protege to Run McBush Campaign

Steve Schmidt, former lieutenant to Karl "Turdblossom" Rove in the Bush/Cheney '04 campaign, has been tapped to take over day-to-day operations of the McBush campaign, which has been, um, floundering of late. C&L has this piece on Turdblossom's boy. Although sorely tempted, Schmidt is not expected to adopt a "truth-in-campaigning" strategy; therefore, don't look for "Four More Years" to be McBush's new slogan.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

The Neglected Enemy In Afghanistan

For the second month in a row, U.S. and allied troop deaths in Afghanistan have surpassed those in Iraq. The recent Pentagon report on the situation in Afghanistan calls the situation in much of the country "fragile" and indicates that the Taliban has become a "resilient insurgency." The Taliban were the hosts and protectors of the al Qaeda leadership and core fighters, from whose ranks came the terrorists that attacked us on 9/11.

You won't be hearing McSame or Joe Lieberliar or wingnut cheerleaders for the Iraq war mention this, because to point to the deteriorating situation in Afghanistan would be to remind the public that the people who attacked us are still at large, and are gaining strength in both Afghanistan and nuclear-armed Pakistan. Meanwhile, our fighting forces are committed to keeping Iraqi Sunnis and Shiites from each others' throats.