"The Confederacy of Takers"

As we've noted today and earlier, one of the theraputic outlets for wingnut angst over the re-election of the Kenyan Socialist Usurper is the secession petition bowel "movement." Dana Milbank would like to point out to these simpletons that theirs would be a "Confederacy of Takers," i.e., that the States they would like to see secede are mostly the ones that get back more in Federal taxes than they pay into the system:

"Red states receive, on average, far more from the federal government in expenditures than they pay in taxes. The balance is the opposite in blue states. The secession petitions, therefore, give the opportunity to create what would be, in a fiscal sense, a far more perfect union. [snip]

"...[W]ould-be rebels from the red states should keep in mind during the coming budget battle that those who are most ardent about cutting government spending tend to come from parts of the country that most rely on it."

Not only that, but the surviving Union would have a much higher average I.Q. without these clueless humps bringing down the average. In that sense, you might call the secessionists' new nation the "Confederacy of Dunces" (w/ apologies to John Kennedy Toole).

UPDATE: We'd support and sign this petition: "[A]t least one petition filed on the ["We the People"] site asks that the president sign an executive order to strip U.S. citizenship from anyone who signed a petition to secede and requests that they are "peacefully deported." Bwahahahaha!

BONUS: We'll let Jon Stewart chime in, too:

The Daily Show
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook