Sen. "Ayn" Rand Paul (Dudebro-KY) made his entry into the Republican presidential race official today (from, we kid you not, a joint in Louisville called the Galt House Hotel), joining fellow conspiracy nutbag Sen. "Tailgunner Ted" Cruz (R-Texass) as the only two announced Republican candidates so far (it's expected Sen. Marco "Glug Glug" Rubio (Teabagger-FL) will be joining them next week, as long as he has access to a bottle of water).
To save everyone time and effort, Wonkette helpfully collected most of the reasons Paul will not be President here. Paul is also having a tough time with two significant Republican/ New Confederate/ Stupid Party constituencies (other than the dazed and confused). Neo-con chickenhawks have, as expected, started an anti-Paul campaign in earnest. In addition, his expedient flip-flopping has caused many libertarians to back off their former hero and nut- who- didn't- fall- far- from- the- tree. We also would like to remind folks that not only is Paul about as shape-changing a weasel-politician as you're going to find, but that he's a liar and plagiarist to boot.
