What's That Musk-y Smell? Musk Owns Twitter! (UPDATED)

 

"Chief Twit" takes over Twitter:

Twitter Inc. is now owned by Elon Musk, with multiple media outlets reporting Thursday night that the long-anticipated sale had officially closed.

The Wall Street Journal, Washington Post and others reported, based on unnamed sources, that the top executives of Twitter TWTR, +0.66% were fired and escorted from the building, including Chief Executive Parag Agrawal, Chief Financial Officer Ned Segal and Vijaya Gadde, head of legal policy, trust and safety.

Musk himself is expected to assume the role of interim CEO, though in the longer term may appoint someone else, Bloomberg reported early Friday, citing unnamed sources. Twitter did not respond to a request by the publication for comment.

Perry Bacon, Jr., expresses the same reaction we have to the takeover:

I need something like Twitter. I don’t need an Elon Musk-infused anything. Watching this story over the past few months, my only question is whether we should wait and see how Musk runs Twitter, or if some tech expert or entrepreneur should just start a new service now. I tend toward the latter.

There's plenty of expertise and financing out there to start a social media service that's minus the Musk-y smell of a far- right, Malignant Loser- enabling billionaire whose cars tend to explode and crash.  (We'll even happily forego our popular "Tweets of the Day" altogether, or in favor of an alternative service!)

Another Post writer, satirist Alexandra Petri, is already imagining a Musk-y Twitter:

It is another glorious day on Mr. Musk’s wonderful internet. We rise early to get the best content ready in time for him to log on! Probably he will have a good idea about international relations or war, or a car that could become a boat (or a boat that could become a car!), and it will be a privilege to hear about that, as it always is. I cannot wait to spend another wonderful day on Mr. Musk’s wonderful internet! I love to make value for Mr. Musk!  [snip]

Finally, we have a wonderful place where free debate can flourish! (“Where a wide range of beliefs can be debated in a healthy manner, without resorting to violence,” as Mr. Musk so wisely put it.) All that censorious content moderation from before was just standing in the way of all the wonderful ideas that people were bringing to market, ideas like, “die, [unprintable].”

Twitter used to be gross and bad and there used to be many people there who felt comfortable openly saying negative things about fascists! Rude! Everyone knows that the only way to combat fascism is to let them be heard and let them silence — through threats of violence — anyone who disagrees with them. The only thing that stops fascists is listening to them really, really carefully. That was what happened in the 1940s, I believe. I don’t remember the time before I joined Mr. Musk’s wonderful internet so well! ...

Buckle up, folks, and get ready for some change at the hands of the aptly self- proclaimed "Chief Twit!" 

(Photo: Musk arriving at Twitter headquarters with a sink; perhaps a toilet would've been more appropriate/ via Elon Musk)

UPDATE:  Great minds ...

 

UPDATE II: The bile has started to flow.