Friday, July 30, 2010

As The Wasilla World Turns


There are reports that soon-to-be Winky son-in-law Levi "Big Johnson" Johnston may have impregnated his ex-girlfriend, Lanesia Garcia, while separated from Winky's daughter, Bristol, who is said to be heartbroken at the news of Big Johnson's "accomplishment." Paternity tests are being conducted, since Garcia (dang them Meskin aliens!) apparently slept with three different guys the week that she likely became pregnant. . .classy!! We're taking bets that Big Johnson's "little swimmers" got there first.

We can't blame Big Johnson for his randy behavior. What is there to do in Wasilla those cold winter nights besides boinking and consuming the meth that your family produces?

(photo: Somebody's been a bad boy. . .again!)

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