Sunday, March 25, 2012

Bored On The Bayou

To no one's surprise, Rethug presidential candidate and female purity monitor Rick "Frothy Mix" Santorum easily won the Louisiana primary, collecting almost 50% of the mouthbreather vote. Three dollar bill Willard "Sketchy" Romney finished a distant second, and savior of Western Civilization Poot Gingrich picked up the rear (and that's quite a rear to have to pick up -- ba dum dum).

That makes it four Southern states won by Frothy, and keeps his slim chances alive until the next primaries in Wisconsin, Maryland and D.C., on April 3. If Frothy can squeeze out a win in Wisconsin, he can make the claim that he's still competitive in an industrial Midwestern state that's been trending blue for 20 years. The best part, of course, is that this win prolongs the Rethug selection process, and allows the public to see just how far right the Rethug/New Confederate Party and its candidates have moved.