A heartbroken militiaman announced that one of his buddies had walked off the Oregon nature preserve they had overtaken and had holed up in a local motel to drink away donation money. [Ed. note: bwahaha!]
Joe Oshaugnessy, an Arizona militiaman, has been actively seeking volunteers through social media to join the occupation of Malheur National Wildlife Refuge.
But his friends tearfully announced that Oshaugnessy, who is known as “Capt. O,” [Ed. note: we prefer to read that as "Zero."] had left the refuge Wednesday and was instead staying at a motel nearby — as some others associated with the militants have apparently been doing, according to sources.
Some of the militants have reportedly been spotted eating at area restaurants during the standoff, as well. [Ed. note: "I'll have the Rooty Tooty Fresh 'N Fruity Pancakes, ma'am."]
The militants have been allowed to come and go freely from the nature preserve in the absence of a law enforcement presence, but at least one of them, Brian “Booda” Cavalier, failed to return after a newspaper report revealed he had lied about serving in the U.S. Marines. [snip]
Jon Ritzheimer, the Arizona militiaman known for organizing anti-Muslim rallies and fundraising through his “Rogue Infidel” site, went to see Oshaugnessy at the motel and found him drinking there, according to Maureen Peltier, a disabled National Guard woman who claims to be the group’s official spokeswoman.
Peltier said Ritzheimer had confirmed that Oshaugnessy had kept the money he had raised through social media for himself and had spent at least some of it on a drinking binge. [Musical accompaniment]
Step forward "Capt. Zero!" You are awarded the Motel 6 Medal with Old Crow cluster (they'll keep the light on for you).
Step forward "Marine" Booda Booda! You are awarded the Legion of Haha with Bullshit cluster.
Of course, this story has to have a Stormtrumper in it for completely glistening schadenfreude. And here he is, "Rump" Trump's New Hampshire veterans co-chair Jerry "DeLoony" DeLemus, who's on a special operations mission to the jamokes' encampment:
Jerry DeLemus, a Trump campaign official and the husband of New Hampshire state Rep. Susan DeLemus, has arrived in Burns, Oregon — where some of his associates have taken over a visitors center at Malheur National Wildlife Reserve.
DeLemus met many of the participants, including ringleader Ammon Bundy, when he traveled cross-country to take part in the armed standoff with federal agents at the Bundy ranch in Nevada, and social media posts show he has maintained ties to the militants who took over the federal building.
In the meantime, DeLemus has taken an official role with Trump’s campaign, taken part in CNN focus groups about the candidate and organized the infamous rally where Trump failed to correct a man who called President Barack Obama a Muslim. [snip]
DeLemus apparently arrived with a videographer Wednesday night in Oregon, where he plans to meet with militants and help them sort out rumors circulating about various participants.The rumors concern "Marine" Booda Booda being a secret gummint spy! Obviously, being the paranoids that they are, something like this was bound to come up... and its been less than a week. Next we hear they'll be roasting Ammon Bundy in the fireplace. And, thanks to DeLoony's videographer, it might all be caught on tape!
Also, you may have heard the name of DeLoony's wife, New Hampshire State Rep. Susan DeLemus. She's quite the unhinged Stormtrumper loon herself.
No wonder the locals want nothing to do with these clowns.
UPDATE: The conspiratorial, paranoid rats are starting to bite each other. Marvelous!
