Today's Cartoon - Generic Republican Distancing Script

(click to enlarge)

(Darrin Bell, via gocomics.com)

Unfortunately for the New Confederate/ Republican/ Stupid Party, chicken hawk and faux patriot "Crap Pants Fever" Nugent represents that party's id.  As a D-list celebrity, he just happens to be in a position to have his vicious sentiments broadcast widely.  It's truth in politics, but it kinda hurts that Republican "rebranding" effort (whatever happened to that?).

Rethug Rebranding: Wango Tango Edition

By now, we're used to third-rate former headbanger Ted "Crap My Pants" Nugent's racist and deranged outbursts, largely directed at President Obama, resulting in visits from the U.S. Secret Service.  For someone who's "patriotism" only extends as far as his cowardly ass, one would think former druggie Crap My Pants (who was also known for his preference for underage girls) would be avoided by the self-righteous, God-bothering Rethuglicans.  One would be wrong.

Rethuglican/New Confederate Party candidate for Governor of Texas, current Attorney General Greg "A Butt" Abbott, has welcomed Crap My Pants on the campaign trail.  A recent event in Denton, TX showed that Crap My Pants is a good draw among the teabagger crowd, who have a terminal case of Obama Derangement Syndrome in addition to hypocrisy.

So, wang dang sweet poontang, "conservative" Bible-bangers of Tex-ass.  You're being taken by a pickled-brain, draft-dodging, sexual predator in a camo hat.  And by one Greg Abbott.