Texas Rethug Gov. Rick "Hair" Perry is expected to announce his candidacy for the Rethug/ New Confederate Party nomination for preznit. Hair's platform will likely include a lot of prayin' to make our troubles go away, keeping the executions comin', turning our public educational institutions into free market labs (translation: fire all them teachers and perfessers!) and, if all else fails, secede! Hair is expected to draw support from fellow talibangelist Michele "Minnesota Loon" Bachmann. Yet another sad commentary on the state of the Rethug party that this featherweight with no accomplishments other than being elected by a constituency of yahoos is considered a serious candidate by the "Very Serious People."
(Photo: That hair, it's so... Reaganesque!)
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