Department of Sanctimonious Lies

Here's disgraced former Speaker and potential Rethug Presidential candidate Poot Gingrich on the Christian (!) Broadcast Network about why he cheated on his second wife:

"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate."

So he cheated because he loved his country soooo much. Wonder what his excuse was when he coldly presented his first wife, Jackie, with divorce papers in the hospital when she was recovering from cancer surgery?

(photo: Please blame his adultery on patriotism!)

Poot: Do As I Say, Not As I Do

We all know that former Rethuglican House Speaker Newt "Poot" Gingrich is an arrogant, elitist, cynical windbag who has a terrible record as a husband (3 times and counting), while yakking about traditional family values whenever he can. Recall that Poot discussed divorce proceedings with his first wife while she was recovering from uterine cancer surgery, and that he had an affair with and proposed to his third wife while still married to his second. A stand up guy, in other words.

But now, his second wife, Marianne, has given a lengthy interview to Esquire magazine, and Poot may have a problem on his pudgy hands. According to the article:

He asked her to just tolerate the affair, an offer she refused.

He'd just returned from Erie, Pennsylvania, where he'd given a speech full of high sentiments about compassion and family values.

The next night, they sat talking out on their back patio in Georgia. She said, "How do you give that speech and do what you're doing?"

"It doesn't matter what I do," he answered. "People need to hear what I have to say. There's no one else who can say what I can say. It doesn't matter what I live."

So "it doesn't matter what I live," huh Poot? Poot thinks he can be a stone-cold hypocrite as long as he can pull the wool over the sheeples' eyes. May this story be spread far and wide.