Tuberville's Residency Questions Unanswered

 

Widely seen as the most ignorant MAGAt in the Senate (and that's saying a lot), jug-eared Tommy Tuberville is one of the most rabid supporters of the Malignant Fascist, staking out positions that are faithful to his cult leader's. Recently, the former Auburn football coach announced that he was leaving the Senate to run for Governor of Alabama, but there appears to be a hitch in his plans for failing upward: he may not be an official resident of the state. Kyle Whitmire writes on AL.com:

"Last week, I challenged Sen. Tommy Tuberville to clear his residency questions once and for all by doing something that most Alabamians would be able to do without any problem — by showing whether he paid state income taxes for each of the last seven years.

To run for the U.S. Senate, he had to live in Alabama only for a day before the 2020 election, but to run for governor in Alabama, residency requirements say a candidate has to live in the state for seven years.

If he truly was an Alabama resident, his income taxes should show it. It’s a chance to lay his cards face up on the table and take the whole pot.

But so far he hasn’t." (our emphasis)

The clueless coach may have been paying state taxes in Florida, where he has a home in Santa Rosa, Florida, and where he voted in 2018, but he won't show his Alabama or Florida taxes to settle the residency question. His wife has a home in Auburn, AL (but he's not on the deed) and he's been using that as "evidence" of his Alabama residency. In any event, since Tuberville hasn't released any tax information so far, his MAGA opponents in their primary elections will be happy to pry it out of him one way or another. Then, perhaps after being disqualified on the residency requirements, Coach Clown can live openly in Florida.

(photo: Contemplating his chances to be Governor / NBC News)

 

Senate May Break Tuberville's Hold On Military Promotions

The Senate moved closer to shutting down white nationalist, jug-eared moron Sen. Tommy "Dixie Dolt" Tuberville's hold on nearly 400 military promotions. The Senate Rules Committee agreed to a resolution that would approve all of the promotions, something Tuberville has blocked over the Pentagon's policy of reimbursing service members for travel out of state to receive reproductive rights care. The measure moves to the Senate floor, where at least 9 Republican votes are needed to pass. Uniformed members of the military have no say over the policy, which was promulgated by civilian political appointees. 

Tuberville's reckless stand has created critical vacancies in the military command, and forced military families to put relocations and other plans on indefinite hold. On October 31, Marine Corps Commandant Gen. Eric Smith was hospitalized after having a heart attack brought on by workloads that he took on because his assistant commandant has been blocked for promotion. Tuberville nonsensically brushed off Gen. Smith's workload complaint, comparing the workload to his coaching days at Auburn. Tuberville has never served one minute in uniform.

(photo: About to be sacked by his teammates?)

 

Sen. Tuberville, Florida's Third Senator

 

As jug- eared jackass Sen. Tommy "Dixie Dolt" Tuberville (MAGA-?) continues to keep a hold on military promotions, questions have been raised about where he actually lives, when he's not threatening our national security at the Capitol.  Intrepid investigators have an answer:

... Tuberville sold, for nearly $1.1 million, the last properties that he owned in Alabama, according to real estate records. The properties, known as Tiger Farms LLC, are in Macon and Tallapoosa counties, on the outskirts of Auburn. That same month, he also sold one Florida condo for $850,000 and bought another for $825,000.

Tuberville’s office says his primary residence is an Auburn house that records show is owned by his wife and son. But campaign finance reports and his signature on property documents indicate that his home is actually a $3 million, 4,000-square-foot beach house he has lived in for nearly two decades in Santa Rosa Beach, Fla., located in the Florida Panhandle about 90 miles south of Dothan.

The Alabama sale in July was notarized by a person who lives in Santa Rosa Beach, indicating Tuberville was there on July 14. His wife, Suzanne Tuberville, a licensed real estate agent in Florida, has worked at a Santa Rosa Beach real estate firm since the start of this year; she does not have an Alabama real estate license.  (our emphasis)

Izzat a problem? Maybe ...

Under the U.S. Constitution, senators are required to be “an inhabitant” of the state when elected, so residency requirements can be minimal. Two Democrats, Robert F. Kennedy and Hillary Clinton, were elected senators from New York shortly after moving there. Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-Fla.), who represents a district in the Panhandle, in 2019 considered running for Alabama’s senate seat. But voters increasingly are sensitive to the perception that a lawmaker is not connected to a state. Sen. Richard Lugar (R-Ind.) in 2012 lost his Senate seat after it emerged that, contrary to Senate rules, he had billed taxpayers for hotel stays in the state. Lugar had sold his home in Indianapolis after he was elected in 1976 and bought one in McLean, leaving him with no residence in the state. 

Being the foobaw coach/ Dixie Dolt means you can gaffe it out and face no consequences as long as there's an "R" after your name on the ballot (so far, anyway):

During his Senate campaign in Alabama, Tuberville didn’t deny he was a newcomer to the state, even though he had once coached football there. “Yes, I am not an everyday resident of Alabama,” he acknowledged to a group of voters in a video posted by the campaign of his main challenger for the GOP nomination, former senator Jeff Sessions. “… I’m a carpetbagger of this country.”  [snip]

In a 2017 promotional video for ESPN, Tuberville says he retired to Florida, not Alabama.

“Six months ago, after 40 years of coaching football, I hung up my whistle and moved to Santa Rosa Beach, Florida, with the white sands and blue waters. What a great place to live,” he said, displaying a view over the ocean from the house.  (our emphasis)

So, living in a $3 million, 4,000 square foot residence on the beach in Florida while ostensibly representing the benighted voters of Alabama.  If only they had the sense to retire him to Florida permanently.

(Photo: The Dixie Dolt / Kevin Dietsch, Getty Images)

QOTD II -- "A Bullet To The Groin"

 

"... In politics, sometimes you have to make enemies, but you always have to make friends. Tuberville doesn’t get that. And a man who’s lost his shirt in two ponzi schemes isn’t likely to learn from his mistakes.  [snip]

"We elected a day-trading, Florida-living, mediocre football coach to the U.S. Senate.

"The blame lands where the responsibility always was.

"We put the toddler in the room with the loose gun, and now we caught a bullet in the groin.

"This one’s on us." -- columnist Kyle Whitmire, scorching Alabama Republican/ White Nationalist Sen. Tommy "Dixie Dolt" Tuberville, for his bone- headed stunt holding up military promotions, which quite possibly led to Pentagon brass supporting President Biden's decision to halt the U.S. Space Command's move from Colorado to Alabama.  A self- inflicted wound by Alabama voters, who've wounded themselves plenty over the decades foolishly voting against their interests.

Tuberville's Stolen Valor

 

 

Alabama's dumbass Republican Sen. Tommy "Dixie Dolt" Tuberville, who's single- handedly holding up military promotions over the Pentagon's abortion policy, has no problem giving imaginary promotions and medals to his WWII veteran father:

For nearly a decade, Tuberville has described the World War II exploits of his father, Charles R. Tuberville Jr., in a relatively consistent way — that he was a tank commander, that he earned five Bronze Stars, that he participated in the D-Day landing and that he lied about his age to join the army. News organizations have tended to accept Tuberville’s version and either reprint or broadcast it.

Yet an examination of army histories, newspaper reports and other materials calls into question many of the claims put forth by Tuberville, who sits on both the Senate Armed Services and Veterans’ Affairs committees and is now in a high-profile battle with the Biden administration over a Defense Department policy offering time off and travel reimbursement to service members who need to go out of state for abortions. Since February, he has blocked every personnel move in the U.S. military that requires Senate confirmation, stalling the promotions of more than 265 senior military officers. The Pentagon has said Tuberville’s holds are putting the nation’s military readiness at risk, as 650 general and flag officers will require Senate confirmation by year’s end.

In effect, Tuberville has promoted his father to highly decorated tank commander — but based on our research, that claim is dubious...

"Dubious."  Translation: bullshit.

The fact checker goes on to call into question or outright explode a number of claims made by the Dixie Dolt, who never served, to add martial luster to the family name.  It's enough bullshit to make George Santos envious.

The fact that this chode wields so much power is all one needs to prove that the rules of the Senate need drastic reform, and maybe that Alabama voters need to prove they're smarter than the Dixie Dolt in order to vote.

(Photo: The Dixie Dolt /Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images)