Your "Liberal" Media

Who's been rewarded with a "news analyst" gig at MSNBC? A great progressive like Ezra Klein? No. Harold Meyerson? No. Russ Feingold? No.

Yay, "liberal media!" It's The Shizzle himself!

(Image: "I'm ready for my close-up!")

The Shizzle To Bow Out?

Tonight Rethuglican National Committee Chairclown Michael "The Shizzle" Steele is expected to announce he won't seek a second term as chairclown, to the great disappointment of Democrats and stand-up comedians everywhere. The Shizzle not only has been a one-clown gaffe machine for the past two years, he's also succeeded in driving the RNC deep into the hole financially (those bondage strip club junkets can be expensive!). We await the inevitable retrospective on all things The Shizzle from Colbert/ Stewart/ Maher!

UPDATE: The Shizzle announced he's running!! Yay!!

(Image: Don't go Shizzle!!!)

The Shizzle Embarks on a Campaign Tour

RNC chairclown Michael "The Shizzle" Steele has packed his bags and is journeying to the vote-rich destination of (wait for it)... Guam! Given The Shizzle's mad managerial and political skillz, Hackwhackers has learned that, following Guam, The Shizzle's itinerary is fully booked until after the November election. Next stops: New Guinea, The Seychelles, Botswana, Timbuktu, Patagonia, Spitsbergen, and Barrow, Alaska.

(Photo: The Shizzle in "native Guam tribal paint" -- or so his staff told him.)

A Disaster, For Shizzle!

Rethug strategist Ed Rollins had some choice words to describe the tenure and leadership of Rethuglican National Committee Chairclown Michael "Shizzle" Steele. If only the average low-information voter would make the connection that "Steele=disaster=GOP." Watch it:

Glutton for Punishment?

It would seem Rethug National Chairclown Michael "The Shizzle" Steele and his Rethuglican entourage have some expensive and ...um... kinky tastes. Not only did The Shizzle want to buy a private jet, but on a February trip to California, an RNC contractor charged (in round numbers) $9,000 at the Beverly Hills Hotel, $6,600 at the Four Seasons, and $1,600 at... uh... "a bondage-themed nightclub featuring topless women dancers imitating lesbian sex" ("not that there's anything wrong with it"). It's good to see at least some of us are doing well in this economy.

Chairclown Steele has some 'splainin' to do.

Show Me The Money

Rethuglican National Committee Chairclown Michael "Tin Man" Steele has some expensive tastes, and major Rethug contributors aren't happy about it. He's apparently spent millions in self-aggrandizing items, such as private aircraft, cars, and catered events. The RNC hasn't done very well in fundraising under Tin Man, so they were down to a relatively meager $8 million in reserves by the end of 2009.

Then again, as one disgruntled donor put it, Tin Man thinks he's a candidate for President, and wants all the trappings to go with it. We think Tin Man's bubble will be bursting before long as the Rethugs put even more constraints on his spending.

Tin Man Passes the Tin Cup

Rethug National Committee Chairman and National Laughingstock Michael "Tin Man" Steele has apparently been charging for his non-official moonlighting appearances - $15,000 or $20,000 a pop! And why not?! Who says just because you're the chairman of a major (?) political party you should avoid appearances of um... avarice?! (Sez Former Rethug National Committee Chairman Frank Fahrenkopf, Jr.: "Holy Mackerel!")

Also on the Rethug front: ConservaDem "Blue Dog" Rep. Parker "Roll" Griffith, freshman from Alabama (where else?) is switching to the Rethugs today. He'd voted almost 100% with them since January anyway, so Good Riddance. Look for Tin Man to hold a press conference... and charge a speaking fee.

(Photo: Tin Man is also available for birthday parties!)

Give Props to Tin Man...Or Else!

Gangsta Rethug National Committee Chair Michael "Tin Man" Steele is upset he wasn't given enough credit for the November Rethug wins in New Jersey and Virginia (we won't mention the two Democrats who won Congressional special elections - we don't want his head to explode). How upset? Enough to fire his communications director, Trevor Francis after only 8 months on the job. Seems, in Tin Man's eyes, Trevor didn't do enough to flog the story line that it was he, the Gangsta cow-on-the-tracks Tin Man, who led the Rethugs into the Promised Land.

I personally feel Tin Man was correct in his decision to terminate Francis. After all, wasn't Tin Man the main draw on the ballots in New Jersey and Virginia? Wasn't it his organizational genius that brought victory home? His stature in the party that made him such a valuable vote getter?

Props to you, my man!

Mind Like A Steele Crap

In an interview with Roland Martin, Rethuglican National Chairclown Michael "Tin Man" Steele declared that white Rethuglicans are "scared" of him.

Well, yes, Tin Man, but only when they're not wearing their white hoods. Maybe if you adopted a friendly, non-threatening persona, say a tap dancer, that would ease their discomfort and conform to their stereotype of you.

(image: a good first start to making the white folks more comfortable with you)

What Up, My Man?!

Actually, RNC Chairclown Tin Man Steele's blog should have been named "What Down?" since that perfectly describes the status of the RNC web site that was recently ...um... launched (if by "launched" you mean "crashed and burned"). "What Up?" has now been renamed, after only 24 hours, "Change the Game." ("Change the Name?" No?)

As Germantown bureau chief Brian tells us, there is already reaction to Tin Man's epic fail in Internet tubes wizardry. We particularly like the comment by "Dave Nowak."

Congressional Rethugs to Tin Man: Shaddup!

The GOP's gift that keeps on giving, Tin Man Steele, has been told by Rethug leaders in Congress to stop meddling in policy. The heated discussion, which took place last month according to Politico, may have been prompted by Tin Man's release of his own seniors' "health care bill of rights," which included a robust defense of Medicare. The dim bulb has been under the delusion that he, not Pills Limpballs, Boo-Hoo Beck, or Winky You Betcha, is the nominal leader of the Rethugs; that, mixed with his irresistible desire to be in front of a camera or microphone, has been a problem for the Rethugs from day one. We wish them more of the same!

Continue to speak out, Tin Man!

Let's Play "Who's The Nut Job?"

Is it:

(A) The NY Times' Thomas "Moustache" Friedman, for calling out the wingnut fringe's obsession with violent imagery and delegitimatizing President Obama, or

(B) "Tin Man" Steele, who responded to Friedman's op/ed by calling him a "nut job."

I think you know how we'd vote, but in case you have any doubt, we offer this as Exhibit A.

Calling Dr. Steele, Dr. Tin Man Steele

A good rule of public speaking is not to accept an invitation to address a topic that you are unfamiliar with. You might get follow-up questions that will give you a "deer in the headlights" moment. Such was the case with Rethuglican National Committee chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele, who was at the National Press Club today to attack President Obama's health insurance plan, but who couldn't answer some basic questions about the health care system in the U.S. Of course, the Rethugs like things the way they are, and want to use the Democrats' health care legislation vote to hand President Obama a defeat (see Rethug Sen. Jim "Demented" DeMint's vile comments posted on Saturday).

By virtue of his position, Tin Man certainly gets Cadillac-level health insurance, but we're not sure whether it covers the extraction of his head from his ass.

BONUS: Tin Man continues with his "off the hook" approach to drawing more minorities into the Rethug party. His latest? "My plan is to say: Y'all come, I got the fried chicken and potato salad."

An' don't forgets duh watermelon, Missuh Tin Man, suh!

(photo: Tin Man's preferred logo for the Rethuglican Party)

Dumb and Dumber

Climate-change legislation will be developed and debated this summer and fall. As one might expect, the Rethugs are in a de-evolutionary spiral to see who can come up with the most ignorant, knuckle-dragging comment about global climate change. With contestants such as Reps. Joe "Methane is Fartin'" Barton (Rethug-TX), Dana "My Mommy Wanted a Girl" Rohrabacher (Rethug-CA), and Sen. James "Duh" Inhofe (Rethug-OK), this will be a hard-fought competition. Here, courtesy of today's WaPo, are several (un)worthy candidates already under consideration:

"The idea that carbon dioxide is a carcinogen that is harmful to our environment is almost comical"-- Rethug House Minority "Leader" John "Man Tan" Boehner (aka "Boner"). The article helpfully points out that, of course, no one is on record suggesting such a thing. But strawmen can be so fun to make for your pea-brained base to froth about.

"We're cooling. We're not warming" - Michael "Tin Man" Steele in March. Maybe you thought the question was about Rethug prospects, My Gangsta?

As Al Gore has been quoted as saying with regard to climate change deniers, "There are people who still believe that the moon landing was staged on a movie lot in Arizona." For Hackwhackers, it only goes to prove the Rethugs are simply adhering to one of the pillars of Republicanism: ignorance.

(Photo: "Man Tan" Boner, the only "comical" thing about the climate change debate.)

The Unbearable Lightness of Stupidity

Wow, are we happy the Rethuglicans have Michael "Tin Man" Steele as their party chairman. His latest venture into stupidity (or has he would say, strategy) came at a meeting of the National Rifle (Automatic Weapons Manufacturers) Association, where he stated that Democrats want "to deny Americans their Second Amendment right to own a firearm" and want to "bring terrorists. . . to our communities" after Guantanamo Bay is closed.

Yup, that'll work: getting the militia-minded wingnuts to stockpile weapons and ammo, thinking that the "gubmint" and black helicopters are coming after them, while unleashing Islamofascistoterrorists on their trailer parks.

Please, please, please Rethugs, don't fire this guy. He's exactly what we need.

More Incomprehensible Babble From Tin Man

The (bong?) hits just keep on comin' from Michael "Tin Man" Steele! Herewith Balloon Juice offers the latest buffoonery from "da Man" (as cosmic dimbulb/ hysterian Bachmann calls him). May we suggest the tin foil chapeau at left for the Tin Man to roll in?

Tin Man: Keeping It Classy!

Rethuglican National Committee chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele has had a bad week.* First, after personally campaigning for Tedesco in the NY 20th district House race, and pouring in party funds, his guy lost to Democrat Scott Murphy. Then yesterday, the Rethugs lost 29-year Senate veteran Arlen Specter to the Democrats. Tin Man, looking more and more like a dead man walking, lashed out at Specter, saying that he "flipped the bird" to the Rethugs by switching, indicating that it was good thing because of Specter's "left wing" views (a remark that's not supported by Specter's voting record, but what are mere facts to delusional Rethugs?).

What we want to know is where is Tin Man's "off the hook" campaign to carry the Rethugs' winning message the "urban-suburban hip-hop settings"? After all, everyone could use a good laugh right now.
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* UPDATE: Looks like the bad week's not over yet; RNC members are petitioning to restrict Tin Man's control over Rethuglican finances. Must be part of Steele's clever strategy.

(photo: Steele introduces his senior advisor for strategy, Mr. Snausage)

I Thought I Was "Da Man"

Rethuglican National Committee chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele has been disinvited to speak at an upcoming wingnut anti-tax on the wealthy "Tea Party" event in Chicago. It seems the tea-baggers thought Tin Man decided to appear at their event only when it gained some media attention. We're shocked, shocked!, that the tea-baggers have such a cynical view of Tin Man.

By the way, Tin Man, how's the "off the hook" public relations campaign going for attracting folks in "the hip hop urban/suburban setting?"

Mind Like A "Steele" Trap

That oh-so-clever Rethuglican National Chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele is on the airwaves again, serving up some real howlers for us to enjoy. Just when we thought his multiple gaffes had forced him to retreat from the public eye, Tin Man appears on CNN and discloses that the dust-up with Rethug Dear Leader Pills Limpballs was all part of Tin Man's "strategy," and was planned by Tin Man to understand his "position on the chessboard." Riiight, say something critical of Pills, then be humiliated by having to retract it and apologize, that's smart strategy!

We dearly hope that Tin Man continues to speak often and loudly. And keeps playing chess.

Hip Hopping Away

The Rethuglican National Commitee is saying that their chairman, Michael "Tin Man" Steele, will be taking himself out of the media spotlight for a while, following almost two months of non-stop gaffes and humiliations (ranging from his "off the hook" campaign to improve the Rethug image, to his latest gaffe where he supported abortion rights before reversing his position). Gee, we didn't see that coming.

Although we don't think they can keep Tin Man quiet for long -- a microphone and TV camera are like magnets to him -- we would be sad if the Rethugs actually succeeded in quieting him. Please keep the political comic gold coming, Tin Man!

(photo: Hip hopping away to an undisclosed location, for shizzle. Hat tip to ZaiusNation)