More Incomprehensible Babble From Tin Man

The (bong?) hits just keep on comin' from Michael "Tin Man" Steele! Herewith Balloon Juice offers the latest buffoonery from "da Man" (as cosmic dimbulb/ hysterian Bachmann calls him). May we suggest the tin foil chapeau at left for the Tin Man to roll in?

This Should Be Fun To Watch

CNN reports that a number of establishment Rethuglicans are forming a group, called the National Council for a New America, to "rebrand" the Rethuglican Party. Some of the old, familiar faces include Sen. John McSame, former Gov. and smaller shrub, Jeb Bush, former RNC chairman and Mississippi Gov. Haley "Stale-ee" Barbour, and Willard "Mitt/Mousse/Flip" Romney.* How in the world will they change their image, when the operation is guided by the usual suspects, who have been saying that the reason they've been losing is because they haven't gone far enough to the right? Another sign of the comedy ahead is the fact that this "Council" will report to Congressional Rethug leaders -- the three stooges McConnell, Boehner, and Cantor -- who will certainly be agents of change.

Notably absent is the hip-hop, off the hook voice of RNC Chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele, a further sign that he's been marginalized in just a few months on the job. (You can also add Gov. Winky You Betcha and Poot Gingrich to those apparently out of the loop -- guess "drill, baby, drill" and shutting down the Federal Government didn't made the "idea" list this time).

*WOLCOTTISM: James Wolcott is already dubbing them the "Elite Anti-Charisma Rescue Team." =snicker=

(Illustration: Daily Kos is adopting the "GOPosaur" as the new Rethug logo; we approve!)

The Good, The Bad, And The Joe

One of the key players in convincing Sen. Specter to switch to the Democratic Party (in addition to right wing Pennsylvania Rethugs) was Vice President Joe Biden, a long time friend and fellow Amtrak rider. Specter credited long conversations with Biden over time as helping him to decide to switch to the Dems. Good for Joe.

Then, the Vice President showed up on the Today Show on NBC this morning, and proceeded to mangle the message that the President delivered last night on the swine flu situation. Instead of reiterating that sick Americans needed to stay home and out of school, off of airplanes and subways, Biden said that he'd suggest everyone avoid "confined spaces" altogether, even if they're not sick: airplanes, elevators, trains, subways, buses, etc. Joe, that would probably bring the country to a standstill; not a good plan. The White House had to rush out a press release to "clarify" his statements. Bad for Joe.

Historian Michele Bachmann Speaks

Cosmic dimbulb and Rethug loon Rep. Michele Bachmann wants us to know what caused the Great Depression: FDR and the "Hoot-Smalley Tariffs!" TPM has the hilarious video.

What a "Hoot!"

"Come Back, And Change My Depends!"

We've seen reports that Playboy geriatric Hugh "Senior Discount" Hefner, 83, wants his 29 year-old playmate, Holly "Show Me The Money" Madison back in his loving, but feeble, arms. Calling her the "love of his life" (and what buxom blonde hasn't been?), the elderly horndog wants to rekindle his relationship with Ms. "Money" but apparently she's having none of it. Come on, Senior Discount, give it up. . .you have hemorrhoids older than she is!

(photo: Um, Hef, you need to change into street clothes when you leave your home; jammies ain't appropriate. And the aviator glasses? Mfffp. Who do you think you are, Brad Pitt?)

Tin Man: Keeping It Classy!

Rethuglican National Committee chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele has had a bad week.* First, after personally campaigning for Tedesco in the NY 20th district House race, and pouring in party funds, his guy lost to Democrat Scott Murphy. Then yesterday, the Rethugs lost 29-year Senate veteran Arlen Specter to the Democrats. Tin Man, looking more and more like a dead man walking, lashed out at Specter, saying that he "flipped the bird" to the Rethugs by switching, indicating that it was good thing because of Specter's "left wing" views (a remark that's not supported by Specter's voting record, but what are mere facts to delusional Rethugs?).

What we want to know is where is Tin Man's "off the hook" campaign to carry the Rethugs' winning message the "urban-suburban hip-hop settings"? After all, everyone could use a good laugh right now.
_______
* UPDATE: Looks like the bad week's not over yet; RNC members are petitioning to restrict Tin Man's control over Rethuglican finances. Must be part of Steele's clever strategy.

(photo: Steele introduces his senior advisor for strategy, Mr. Snausage)

Department of Delusional Thinking

"Losing Specter may help produce greater GOP gains in November 2010, and a brighter Republican future." -- Wee Willie Kristol, commenting on Sen. Arlen Specter's switch to the Democratic Party. He extends his perfect record of being wrong on everything.

With only 21% of Americans identifying themselves as "Republicans," the purge of the few remaining moderates from the Party of No can't help but drive those numbers down. . .will they be happy with a "pure" right wing party with 15% or 10% membership? It looks that way, and more power to them.

(photo: Wee Willie was told it was pie eating contest)

Snowe News Is Good News?

Those trying to read the political impact of Arlen Specter's switch to the Democratic Party can add some Greek spices to the soup in the form of Sen. Olympia Snowe (R-ME), who today said she was "devastated" by Specter's move, adding:

"I believe in the traditional tenets of the Republican Party: strong national defense, fiscal responsibility, individual opportunity. I haven't abandoned those principles...I think the Republican Party has abandoned those principles."

Sounds an awful lot like someone preparing to jump.

Clueless Conservatives

Jason Linkins, in HuffPo, reports on an Ohio State study showing that conservatives actually think Stephen Colbert is one of them, blissfully unaware that his political satire is aimed directly at their marble heads. Is this so surprising, though, considering the Rethug base still thinks there was an al-Qaeda/ Saddam Hussein link, or that Dumbya was the bestest Preznit evah, or that Adam and Eve romped with the dinosaurs, or that... well you get the picture.

Arlen Specter leaving the Rethugs lowered their party's average national IQ by 25 points.

Sen. Specter Switching To Dems

Huge political news. News organizations are reporting that Pennsylvania Sen. Arlen Specter will switch parties from Rethuglican to Democratic. Saying that his political philosophy is "more in line with the Democrats than Republicans," Specter becomes the 59th Dem vote -- just one shy of the "supermajority" needed to block a fillibuster -- in the Senate for the Democrats. Now, let's get Al Franken seated and stick it to the Party of No.

Note to Rethugs: bwahahahahahaha!

May We Suggest A New Symbol. . .

. . .for the Party of No?

Think of the physical similarities between our nominated mascot and Poot Gingrich, Pills Limpballs, and other porcine representatives of the Rethug right. And with their recent swinish behavior regarding the economy, torture under Cheney, and the swine flu breakout, it seems like a perfect match.

(photo: our apologies to pigs everywhere for our suggestion; elephants, however, must be delighted)

Sebelius To Be Confirmed

The outbreak of swine flu has apparently shaken loose the stalled nomination of Kansas Gov. Kathleen Sebelius to be Secretary of Health and Human Services, which is expected today. Rethugs had been delaying Sebelius' confirmation allegedly because of her pro-choice views. As we noted yesterday, they were also in the forefront of cutting funds for swine flu vaccinations and other Center for Disease Control programs.

So it takes a potential epidemic to get the Party of No to temporarily stop their obstruction. The American people are watching.

Rethugs Gutted Flu Pandemic Funding in Stimulus

When the stimulus bill was being negotiated in the Senate, Rethugs, led by "moderate" (as in "stupid in a moderate way") Sen. Susan "What Swine Flu?" Collins, demanded that $870 million in flu pandemic preparation funds be stripped out of the bill, reports John Nichols in The Blog. Collins and her Rethug colleagues were largely successful in taking out the flu pandemic monies, with an assist by Turdblossom Rove, who was providing talking points to the Senate numbnuts, and agitating against it in all the usual wingnut venues as an example of wasteful government spending.

More Rethug good government values at work for you!

(Photo: Turdblossom demonstrates his technique for warding off the swine flu - oh wait, he's naturally immune since he's a swine...)

An Old Brand Falls

Very sad news that General Motors is dropping the Pontiac brand, due to falling sales. Pontiac was one of GM's oldest brands (1926), and was famous for such models as the Grand Prix, Bonneville, GTO and the Firebird. A white '70 Firebird Esprit was one Hackwhacker's first wheels, and the brand has been part of the family for decades, including a Pontiac dealership. It's too bad they can't survive on the good memories of their customers.

Out-Foxed

A new Pew Research poll indicates that, by a wide margin, Americans point to the Fux News Channel as being too critical of President Obama. Some 29% identify the Fuxers when asked which of the six broadcast and cable news channels have been too critical. No channel was singled out as being too favorable toward the President. So Fux News, headed by former Reagan aide Roger Ailes, hasn't fooled many Americans into thinking that they're "fair and balanced." With a steady diet of Manatee Hannity, O'Liely, Dreck Beck, and the rest of the crew, Americans see the Fuxers for what they are: a partisan subsidiary of the Rethuglican Party.

UPDATE: Case in point: Fux caught fabricating.

(cartoon by Latoff)

Quote of the Day

"Instead of saving us from 'another 9/11,' torture was a tool in the campaign to falsify 9/11 so that fearful Americans would be bamboozled into a mission that had nothing to do with Al Qaeda. The lying about Iraq remains the original sin from which flows much of the Bush White House's illegality." -- the awesome Frank Rich, writing in today's New York Times. Read the whole op-ed column.

Broder's Angst

It's almost "torture" to read David "Bipartisan" Broder's op/ed in today's WaPo. If the poor geezer isn't sure what "torture" is (since he puts "s around the word), he should ask those of us who have to suffer him week in and week out. This useless douchebag is of the "nothing to see here, move along" school when it comes to his former cronies and lunch-mates at The Palm. They've suffered enough by being kicked out of office! Why "humiliate" them further?

How much longer will the Post "torture" us with his presence?

To the Right, March!

The latest WaPo/ABC News poll provides further reinforcement for President Obama, who garners approval for every key domestic and foreign policy issue with the exception of the auto industry bailout, and an overall approval rating of 69%. Significantly, the "right track" numbers are around 50%, whereas in October they stood at 8%.

The news for the shriveling entity known as the Republican Party? Not so good, especially for Rethugs in Congress who only gain the confidence of 21% (!) of the public "to make the right decisions for the country." That appears to be the extent of the hard-core Rethug base right now. A base that seems to be moving farther right into fully certified Bachmann/Beck nut territory.

On The American Taliban Front

Yes, there are dangerous Taliban forces active in Afghanistan and Pakistan, but we also have our own homegrown versions of these nutcases. Case in point: our high school alma mater, Walt Whitman High School in Bethesda, Maryland, was picketed yesterday by 7 members American Taliban from Westboro Baptist "Church" in Topeka, Kansas. The nutjobs were protesting the naming of the high school (uh, in 1962) after one of America's most beloved poets, Walt Whitman, who was reputedly gay. Horrors! Fortunately, the nutjobs were met by a large counter-demonstration of 500 who suggested that the nutjobs "go home," among some more colorful suggestions.

It should be noted that these nutjobs have also appeared at funerals of military vets to protest "teh gay in the military", and have been driven off by angry bikers and vets who have little patience with the wingers' lack of respect for the dead servicemen.

Al Gore Devours A Congressional Wingnut

There was a wonderful moment captured by Talking Points Memo during a hearing on climate change, that featured an exchange between Nobel Prize winning former Vice President Al Gore and Tennessee Rethug Congresswoman Marsha "Mallo" Blackburn. She attempts to insinuate that Gore is "profiting" from his advocacy of green technology, and Gore neatly pierces Marsha Mallo, places her over the fire, spins her multiple times, and turns her into a smore. Bwahahahaha, well done, big Al! Next time, we'll bring sister wingnut Michelle "I See Commies" Bachmann for the weenie roast.

Quote of the Day

"The CIA inspector general in 2004 found that there was no conclusive proof that waterboarding or other harsh interrogation techniques helped the Bush Administration thwart any 'specific imminent attacks,' according to recently declassified Justice Department memos." -- Mark Seibel and Warren Stroebel writing for the McClatchy Newspapers.

As more is learned from declassified documents, it's becoming apparent that Dead Eye Dick Cheney is out-and-out lying about the value of the torture of detainees. At least Dumbya has the minimal integrity to STFU.

Dem Murphy Wins in NY

It didn't even take the 48 hours some thought it might for the race to be decided in the heavily Republican NY-20, as Rethug Jim Tedisco conceded to Democrat Scott Murphy today. Murphy maintained a 400+ vote margin of victory over most of the past month.

Paul Krugman Nails It

How we wish there were more people like Nobel Prize winning economist Paul Krugman, who writes with simple eloquence on his New York Times blog, "Conscience of a Liberal":

"The Bush Administration was obviously -- yes, obviously -- telling tall tales in order to promote the war it wanted: the constant insinuations of an Iraq-9/11 link, the hyping of discredited claims of a nuclear program, etc. And, the question was, should you stand up against that? Not many did, and those who did were treated as if they were crazy."

Thousands of lives lost and people maimed. Osama bin Laden still at large, because for Preznit Chimpy and his sinister vice president, hunting him down wasn't "a priority." And they tortured in the attempt to get false confessions about an Iraq-al Qaeda link.

Just Wondering. . .

. . . .whether right-wing Gov. Mark "States' Rights" Sanford of South Carolina, who wanted to turn down Federal stimulus money, will be rejecting Federal emergency funds after declaring a state of emergency in parts of his state battling wildfires. They're nothing if not hypocrites.

Another Dem Win?

The race for the 20th district House seat vacated by New York Sen. Kristin Gillibrand might be over in the next 48 hours. Democrat Scott Murphy leads Rethuglican Jim Tedesco by a comfortable margin, despite numerous Rethug challenges.

The Rethugs poured resources and people into this contest, hoping to embarrass President Obama with a "referendum" on his policies. It turns out that polling is indicating that Tedesco might have won the race if he hadn't been opposed to Obama's stimulus bill -- the 20th district is in bad shape economically, and wants the stimulus money. It was also supposed to be an early test of Rethug National Committee chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele's leadership, with some saying that his chairmanship would be in jeopardy if Tedesco lost. Let us be the first to hope so.

"The Bailout is a Bargain"

In today's Wall Street Journal (!) on-line, David Weidner makes a strong case for why, regarding the Wall Street bailout, the teabaggers were getting their Depends in a knot for no reason (btw, we don't assume that the bailout was the main reason the cranks were teabagging; more like general anti-Obama rage). If they didn't have this to cry about, you know it would be something else (the fascist takeover of America, the re-education camps, the DHS alert on right-wing extremist violence, etc., etc.). Waaaaa!

(Photo: teabagger not (?) acting his age)

Meghan McCain on Cheney, Rove

Wow. I'm starting to like this lady more and more. Here's another reason why.

(Photo: Meghan McCain, the new captain of the Straight Talk Express)

Tootin' Poot

Lance Mannion has a memorable take on Poot Gingrich's newfound "celebrity" as the go-to guy for right wing pablum, even though Poot hasn't faced election in years. As Mannion says:

"He speaks for no one but himself, and the only authority he speaks with is the smug authority of the dealer in a back room poker game who knows the local cops have been paid off and he's got a tableful of drunken country boys to fleece."

(photo: Poot Gingrich, left, exclaiming to an admirer "Man, I wish I had that gut, but I'm workin' on it!")

Torture, Lies and A Needless War

Listening to former (Vice) President Dead Eye Dick Cheney talk, you would think that the torture program that the White House initiated late in 2001 was aimed solely at stopping future al Qaeda terrorist attacks. Not true. A report from the Senate Armed Services Committee released yesterday says that CIA and military interrogators were directed by the White House to apply torture methods to find an operational link between al Qaeda and Saddam Hussein to help build a case for invading Iraq, even though the White House was told early on that there was no such link.

This is reminiscent of the story about neocon manipulators insisting just days after 9-11 that we had to hit Iraq, and of the Bushit Assministration's singular focus on striking Iraq, beginning with their first National Security Council meeting in January, 2001.

The mantra of the Bushies is "we were kept safe for 7 years" (of course after we were attacked on 9-11 on their watch). But they used torture methods not so much to locate the people who attacked us -- bin Laden and his lieutenants -- but to manufacture a phony case for war with Iraq. After all, by March 13, 2002 -- 6 months after 9-11 -- Dumbya was claiming he didn't care where bin Laden was: "It's not that important. It's not our priority." War with Iraq was.

The Fatherly Bishop

Former Catholic Bishop and current Paraguayan President Fernando "Love Me" Lugo is trying to deal with claims from three women that he fathered their 3 children while he was still a Bishop. One of the women, now 26, says she began her relationship with Lugo when she was 16.

Holy contraception, Batman! Get this guy a reality show!

Twitter Now Officially Uncool

First it was Dancin' Dave Gregory, now we hear Larry King has a Twitter account. As has been noted no doubt before now, you can't spell "Twitter" without "twit."

(Photo: Larry King twitting, "I gotta remember to empty my colostomy bag.")

Beach Blanket Bozos

Something calling itself the Young Conservatives Coalition is marking Earth Day with a "Global Warming Beach Party" rally in Washington, DC. Well, it's certainly comforting to know that the future of the conservative movement is in the hands of these bright folks!

(Photo: member of Jumbos for Jesus, sub-sect of the YCC, training for today's rally)

O My!

Hat tip to Germantown correspondent Brian, who pointed out this story about the misspelled "Natinals" jerseys to us. The tea baggers must have been at work that day.

Morans! More home skooling is in ordure!

Quote of the Day

"It won't surprise you that I don't consider him a particularly reliable source." -- Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, testifying today before the House Foreign Affairs Committee, referring to former (Vice) President Dead Eye Dick Cheney's views on the torture of detainees, which he of course applauds. Yesssss, that's how it's done!

Secretary Clinton was a brilliant choice by the President for the State Department. Guts, smarts, and passion rolled into one person. Clinton may end up being the best Secretary of State in a century. (And VP for Obama in 2012? What a ticket that would be.)

It's Earth Day

Every April 22, we celebrate Earth Day to focus on environmental issues and to recommit to a green future. Earth Day started in 1970 as an environmental teach-in sponsored by the renowned environmentalist, the late Wisconsin Senator Gaylord Nelson, and has marshalled the energies of millions over the years to fight for a clean environment.

Leaving a cleaner, greener planet for future generations is the ultimate gift.

Gripping WaPo Reading

The WaPo's political "reporter" Dan "No" Balz has an "analysis" of Obama's "different style and tone" in foreign policy, different from Dumbya's that is. If we could paraphrase "No's" "analysis", entitled "Obama's Gripping Style Overseas":

I don't know if Obama's grip 'n' grin with Chavez helps or hurts. I'm only getting paid to regurgitate Villager conventional wisdom, which in this case is, well, we'll just have to see about that!

"No", we're sure the lukewarm seat that Broderella is currently fouling with his bipartisan ass gas is yours for the taking someday! Keep up the mediocrity! You're a worthy successor!

How Do You Say "We Surrender" in Spanish?

Well, it's only been a couple of days, but we're in our bunkers, armed with English/Spanish dictionaries, awaiting the Venezuelan flag to be hoisted over the White House, after President Obama's handshake and smile for Venezuelan leader Hugo "No, You Go" Chavez at the Pan American summit.

After all, as we noted yesterday, the wingutosphere, egged on by Poot Gingrich and lesser lights in the Rethuglican firmament, has told us this is the end of America as we know it. In reality, Chavez was focused on Obama like a heat-seeking garbanzo, as were other leaders crowding around to greet the popular President. In contrast, at the summit two years ago, it was Chavez who was greeted like a hero, while Preznit George W. Culo was sitting by himself, trying to look unconcerned.

The Rethugs are clearly grasping at any little straw, calling him "socialist" and "fascist" in the same ignorant breath, and throwing any bogus issue out to try to cause President Obama's high approval ratings here and abroad to drop. It ain't working, wingers.

UPDATE: It's good to see the President mocking the wingnuts' manufactured outrage. Keep it up.

Congratulations

... to one of America's best progressive columnists, the WaPo's (and MSNBC's) Eugene Robinson, who won this year's Pulitzer Prize for commentary. Robinson is one of the few reasons (E.J. Dionne being another) for picking up the Post these days. You can also catch him on a fairly regular basis on MSNBC's "Countdown with Keith Olbermann" and on other MSNBC venues. Well deserved!

Uh, Dave, It's "Meet the Press", not "Press the Meat"

We see where Media Villager David "Dancin' Dave" Gregory's ratings on "Meet the Press" have slipped by 6% from last year, when the late Timmeh Russert hosted the Sunday program. Some reviews have been less than kind to Dancin' Dave, saying he was showing "little energy and virtually no passion" (David Zurawick at the Baltimore Sun), and not very interested "in pushing the talking heads off of their talking points" (Verne Gay in Newsday). Guess not much has changed since he "covered" the Bush White House.

Well, if the "Meet the Press" gig doesn't work out for Dancin' Dave, there's always work to be had as a dancing instructor.

(photo: Dancin' Dave, left, with partner Turdblossom Rove gettin' their groove on)

America's Domestic "9-11"

Yesterday was the 14th anniversary of the bombing of the Alfred Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City by right wing fanatics Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols. The explosion killed 168 innocent people, injured hundreds more, and caused millions of dollars in damage to the building and to other structures nearby. It's the worst case of domestic terrorism to date.

Unfortunately, right wing fanaticism is resurging among an embittered and volatile fringe, who are beginning to act out their rage at the election results. From the shooting of police in Pittsburgh by a paranoid winger, to the unhinged rantings of Hannity, Beck and Bachmann, the paranoid right is feeling emboldened to voice and to act on their hatred. The Department of Homeland Security's report on right wing violence that was issued last week touched off howls of protest from the usual suspects in the Wingnut Media Wurlitzer. The good news is that the vast majority of Americans are disgusted by the right's views. The bad news is that another Oklahoma City only requires a new Timothy McVeigh to emerge from the wingnut swamp.

(photo: The Oklahoma City National Memorial)

Halperin & Politico: Poot's Infantry

Balloon Juice wraps up (with the able assist of James Wolcott) the latest attempt by the deranged right - led in this charge by Sgt. Poot Gingrich - to see if their latest thrown pig shit will stick to the wall. (Not likely, though the wall is getting awfully thick with the stuff.) Villager co-conspirators Mark "Asshat" Halperin and Politico fill in the ranks behind Sgt. Poot. (Poot's girth notwithstanding, this is truly the Charge of the Light Brigade).

(Image: Asshat Halperin marveling over the latest egg laid by Poot Gingrich.)

Milbank: Don't Hate on Me

WaPo snark columnist Dana Milbank wants to know Why the hate from the left? He says he understands right-wing nuts' anger (they lost the last few elections -- badly), but us left-wing nuts? Offering a few readers' opinions from left and right, he still is mystified by the anger from the left at his writing.

Let me give my own personal reason for disliking Milbank's work: he's a quibbler, a jaded jackass whose valuable column space would be better taken up by a serious observer (like a Glenn Greenwald or Naomi Klein). When the focus of the media is all too often on the superficial and the anomalous, playing to popular stereotypes, Milbank is the snarky epitome of the "journalist" detached from what's going on in the real world. And what's going on in the real world deserves serious attention, not flippant columns about Obama behaving like a "LendingTree.com pitchman."

Milbank doesn't like to choose sides. He's an equal opportunity snarker. Much like the eunuchs who manage and contribute to the WaPo's editorial page (calling Fred Hiatt, calling David Broder), he sees virtue in a "middle ground" that exists only in the abstract. That he's been subjected to criticism from right and left seems to be a badge of journalistic honor for Milbank. I see it differently. In times when serious people are trying to do serious work to repair our economy, our standing in the world, and our planet itself, there are sides to be chosen. Are you for or against? Being in your bubble, snarking about people trying to turn things around may make you a hero of the Washington salon class, but it also contributes mightily to the perception that the "old media" is out of touch with the real concerns of real people-- and that Milbank, like much of the Washington political/ media class is still "wired Republican."

And as far as the "unhinged left?" Did you see some of those teabaggers' signs this week? That stuff was "off da hook" (to use Tin Man Steele's hippity hop lingua franca).

Good For Her

It's rare that we give positive reviews to Rethuglicans, but in the case of Meghan McCain, we'll make an exception. Recently, she took far right harpies (M)Ann Coulter and Laura "Seabiscuit" Ingraham to task for their extremist views. That took some courage. McCain also had to endure catty sniping from Seabiscuit over her full figure (we're guessing 90% of men would rather date Ms. McCain over Seabiscuit, but that's beside the point).

Now, speaking to the gay Log Cabin group, McCain said a "civil war" was brewing between Rethugs who want to stay in the past and those who are looking to the future. She went on to enumerate those things that seperate her from the backward-looking wingers in her party.

She's showing commendable common sense, moderation and independence. Which will cause the majority of Rethugs to reject her.

Dressing For Success

Daily Kos notes that the lead Rethuglican hack in charge of vetting vice presidential candidates in last year's Presidential race is claiming that Gov. Winky You Betcha was impressive in her interview (!!!), and hit three standard questions posed "out of the park." Maybe he meant the kiddie park at the local fast food place. He should have asked her about the Bush Doctrine, or if she could see Putin rearing his head from her window. "You betcha! *wink wink*"

Quote of the Day

"Also, have you noticed how places that pride themselves on being superpatriotic seem to have the most people who want to abandon the country entirely and set up shop on their own? . . .And how, by the way, can you stand at a rally waving the American flag while yelling 'Secede?'" -- columnist Gail Collins in today's New York Times.

Because patriotism to these fringe extremists is all about adherence to the conservative Rethug cult, not about America and its popular President.

Tex-ass For Sale? Yahoooo!!

Now that Texas' Rethuglican Governor-Clown Rick "Dipstick" Perry is mulling over seceding from the union, some want to beat him to the punch and sell the state to the highest bidder (Mexico, China, etc.) on eBay before they can secede. Great idea, but we'll miss seeing washed-up actor Chuckles Norris, who has said he wants to be "President of Texas," duking it out with Dipstick for the secessionist presidency. Another upside: unloading Texas would raise the average IQ of the U.S.

(photo: Texas' symbol: a lot of bull)

Not That There's Anything Wrong With That

Steven Colbert has the definitive response ad to the anti-gay mob, mocking the National Organization for Marriage's "storm is gathering" farce.

Even a key Rethug architect of Sen. John McNasty's campaign, Steve Schmidt, is telling the Rethuglicans to get over their obsession with gay marriage.

Unfair and (Definitely) Unbalanced

Why are we not surprised that the Fux Channel aired 107 ads promoting the right-wing "tea parties" over the 10 days previous to April 15? Media Matters has the details.

They not only had the ads running, but all of their lame shows, from the execrable "Fox and Friends" to the Sean "Heil" Hannity show were pimping the "grass roots" tea baggings early on. They had their stellar "correspondents" from Boston to Sacramento pumping up the volume for the wingnut crowd.

Quote of the Day

"Conservatives are so incensed by warnings about the right-wing threat of radicalism that they're considering overthrowing the federal government." -- Talking Points Memo blog, noting that 4 days ago the extremist wingnuts were up in arms about being identified as a threat by the Dept. of Homeland Security, only to demonstrate the accuracy of the DHS report by calling for "secession" from the union.

News Item for Teabaggers

"...[N]ew data showed that the federal income tax burden is already hovering near its lowest level in three decades for all but the wealthiest Americans." WaPo news item, p. A12, 4/16/09.

The Congressional Budget Office, which provided the data, estimated that the average family paid barely 9 percent of its earnings in federal taxes in 2006. This trend is continuing under President Obama's recently enacted middle class tax cut, which cut taxes for approximately 95% of American families. Obama has vowed to continue these tax relief measures in the future. So, what the teabaggers are concerned about is really the fact that their upper income tax rate is going up 3% (!), back to where it was in the Clinton boom years. Boo-effing-hoo!

The Fizzle in the Teazzle

Yesterday's "tea parties" were a fizzle, since proponents were hoping for a million protesters and got about one-quarter of that amount nationwide, even according to the always reliable wingnut media outlet Pajamas Media. (By comparison, Steven Colbert got 230,000 votes to name a room in the international space station after him).

Fux News utterly failed in its strong promotion of this phony "grass roots" event. The mystery remains: where were these stalwart deficit hawks in the 8 years of the Bushit Assministration? Seems they "discovered" their "principles" after January 20, 2009.

Jon Stewart has the best wrap-up on the weak tea movement (in the digestive meaning of the word).

(photo: Denver's "tea party" which must have drawn a massive 50 people, tops!)

Another Rethug Patriot

Speaking yesterday to a crowd of tea bagging wingnuts and other assorted nutjob losers in Austin, TX, Texas Rethuglican Gov. Rick "Dipstick" Perry really did himself proud. Repeatedly referring to the "oppressive" Federal government and praising "states' rights", Dipstick had some in the crowd waving signs saying "Secede." At a press conference later, he said that at some point, Texans might get so fed up they would want to secede from the union. When asked if he supported Texas' secession from the United States, Dipstick squirmed, but said, "who knows what might come out of that." Wasn't it just a few months ago when the Rethugs were throwing around the word "treason" for anyone who disagreed with Dumbya and Dead Eye? Now who's disloyal?

News flash for Gov. Dipstick: we've already had a Civil War, and your side LOST. Also, Dip, you might want to check the legal definition of "sedition," because you're right on the edge of it.

"Sir, May I Have More Juicy Juice?"

The Onion reports that 7 year-old Sasha Obama collected nearly $136 in allowance money in 2008. Yes, she's adorable, but where's the outrage? Key question from the Congressional committee, "How could you during this time of economic turmoil -- during this time of economic despair -- accept nearly 50 cents for making your bed?"

Where are the tea baggers when we need them? Tea bagging?

Tea for Two (Hundred? Maybe?)

Check out Daily Kos. It has a run down of the multitudes that've turned out for some teabaggin' today (and by multitudes we mean "a couple dozen"). If this is representative of the turnout nationwide, it could be the most embarrassing fizzle for the right-wing nuts since, oh, the latest polls on party approval.

Please note the overwhelmingly small, white, elderly, dispirited looking crackpot "crowds" with their racist/ stupid/ mean-spirited little signs. About what we were expecting, despite the flacking and hacking by the Fox Nutwork and the other asswhistles on the fringe of American life.

NASA Honors Colbert

While Stephen Colbert won't be getting Node 3 of the International Space Station named after him (artist's concept of the failed entry at left), NASA did announce it would name another piece of equipment after our favorite "pudnit." Well played by all!

The Tea-ed Off Right

Today is the deadline for State and Federal taxes, and we'll no doubt see wingnuts demonstrating in front of Fux News cameras all day long with their tea bags swaying. It's been a classic case of "astroturfing" -- phony grass roots activity, sponsored by elites to appear genuine -- with corporate types and right wing foundations kicking in funds, providing public relations and logistical support, and, in the case of Fux News, actual promotion 24/7. The vast majority of the turnout will be the Bushit deadenders who were missing in action during the years when Dumbya and his Rethug Congress ran up the national debt and created huge deficits, while cutting taxes for the very rich. Ironically, the majority of the public believes that the income taxes they pay are "about right" or "too low."

So let the wingnut teabaggers stamp their feet and have their demonstrations. They're still working out their anger over their defeats in 2006 and 2008.

(P.S., as many observers have noted, the right wing tea baggers should check the Urban Dictionary before deciding what to call themselves. Bwahahahaha!)

"Pay No Attention to that Bomb-Making Right Winger Behind the Curtain"

Ah yes, it's good to know someone is finally taking the violent right-wing nut rhetoric seriously (besides the progressive blogosphere). Firedoglake reports on the angry wingnut blogger reaction to news that the Department of Homeland Security (heh, let that concept sink in!) issued a report alerting local law enforcement to the increasing danger of violent right-wing extremists.

To the tea baggers, Becks, Bachmanns, Manatees, Malkins, Limpballs, Poots and all the rancid yokels who comprise this noxious stew, be on notice: words have consequences, and violent words have violent consequences.

(Image: Field Marshal Y.B. Sane, commander of the Malkin Brigade.)

Reinventing Dumbya

The continued attempts at reinventing former Preznit Dumbya's legacy have been underway for some time now, with Turdblossom Rove and Ari "Flush Me" Fleischer leading the lying band of former aides. They're gathering in Dallas this week to discuss plans for something called a "George W. Bush Policy Institute." WaPo columnist Richard Cohen -- who, like a blind squirrel, sometimes find a nut -- suggests that the institute should be named "George W. Bush Institute of Management Failure," and proceeds to remind us of the horrific legacy of the Chimpster and his incompetent band: two unfinished wars, the aftermath of Katrina, subversion of the Constitution, and a wrecked economy. Well worth a read.

Frankly, we don't care what they do with their joke of an "institute," but when they attack a President who has been in office for 11 weeks and who is trying to clean up the mess they left behind, they deserve ridicule.

(photo: management genius at work)

Quote of the Day

"Can we seat a senator so Amy [Klobuchar] doesn't have to do the job of two senators? It is seriously not fair to constituents in Minnesota to drag this out any longer. It is over, Norm, OK? It is over." -- Former Rethuglican congressman and Morning Joe host Joe "D" Scarborough, calling on Norm "The Loser" Coleman to admit his loss of the Senate seat last November to Senator-elect Al Franken.

(photo: the winner of his high school's "most likely to whine" award)

Why Does The Right Wing Hate America?

Here's a nice summary of the Pills Limpballs Party of No's reaction to the piracy off the Somali coast, and why the right-wingers were hoping for an American failure: so they could taunt Obama as "weak on national security." Ideology over country: works every time. All they have now is to hope that things go badly wrong: the economy, terrorism, etc. True patriots!!

Well, that didn't work out so well for the anti-American wingnuts, did it?

A Mad Tea Party

As noted in this article from Daily Kos, next Sunday is the 14th anniversary of the Oklahoma City bombing. The right-wing militia movement spawned the bomber, Timothy McVeigh, and yet many of that movement's paranoid conspiracy theories are today finding voice through the deranged Glenn Beck on the Fixed Channel. The basic themes include the Government confiscating guns, an international cabal running the Government, and the IRS and Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms are the enemy. The rhetoric used by Beck in promoting the idiotic "Tea Parties" borders on sedition, calling for his wingnut audience to rise up and "take America back" from a Government elected by a solid majority of the people. How long will it be before some of them, armed to the teeth and volatile, start storming Federal offices, killing immigrants, or some other outrage?

Beck may be nuttier than a fruitcake, but his antics are taken seriously by mouthbreathers who are eager for his validation of their paranoia.

(illustration: Beck as the Mad Hatter, courtesy of Driftglass, who also has a clip of some loony tea party participants who want to start burning books, reminiscent of the Third Reich)

The Wasillabilly War, Cont'd.

After Levi Johnston claimed that he and Bristol Palin were "living together" during her pregnancy at the Governor's house, Gov. Winky You Betcha was asked in a press conference whether that was true. In a classic case of closing the barn door after the horses escaped, Winky said, "it would be over my dead body that a kid would live with my teenage daughter."

We look forward to the next salvo from the Johnston clan.

Worth Reading

Frank Rich has a great column in today's New York Times about the greed culture of the past 25 years, and how the graduates of our most prestigious colleges should be challenged to "make your life something good" (a line from the depression era play "Awake and Sing"), and not just make money. Much like President Obama, who could have landed a job at a top law firm right out of Harvard, but chose community work in Chicago, this would represent a healthy "counternarrative" to the past one of "money is king," and may be as important to America's future as all the stimulus money put together.

The New Addition to the White House

The Obamas gather around their new puppy, a Portugese Water Dog -- a "Portie" -- that they've named "Bo." The puppy is a gift from Sen. Ted Kennedy.

(White House photo/Sousa)

A Conservative's Post-Mortem

House Republicans are "cowards, sycophants, and snobs" and the wingnut media are "barkers, hookers, establishmentarian jesters, cultists, and...thatch-headed whiners." These assessments would be expected coming from, say, us. But coming from right-wing hate radio veteran John Batchelor, they're a sign that at least some on the right have the capacity for critical thinking. A longer snippet of Batchelor's post-mortem of the Rethug Party is carried by James Wolcott. Sometimes the truth hurts, Rethugs.

Quote of the Day

Here's former Bushit senior aide/counsel Dan "Fart" Bartlett, reflecting on Dumbya's post-Presidential mood:

"He's secure in the place he's in. He's confident in the decisions he's made. There's none of that shoulda, woulda, coulda."

Has Dumbya ever had a reflective moment? Has he ever been anything other than superficial? Thousands died because of the decisions he made (Katrina, Iraq, etc.).

Worst. President. Ever.

Cataloging the Crazy

Once again, for your edification (if not stupefaction), Balloon Juice has the latest handy summary of the tinfoil-hatted extremism that characterizes the leading edge of the Rethug Party these days.

All that's missing is the background calliope/ glockenspiel music... (we'll supply that: boop boop boop, boop boop boop...)

17 "Socialists", and 1 Loon

Alabama Rethuglican Rep. "Bull Dis-" Spencer Bachus claims to know of 17 "socialists" in the House of Representatives. How Bull Dis-Spencer arrived at this calculation is a mystery, since he won't divulge who he thinks they are. Is it because they want to raise the top tax rate from 36 to 39 percent? Marxists bahstads!

Hackwhackers can confirm that the House of Representatives has many loons, one of whom is Bull Dis-Spencer Bachus.

"Spontaneous" Teabaggers in a Tizzy

Think Progress has a piece on the upcoming "tea bag" parties, and how they're, um, not exactly the grassroots affairs that the prime sponsors over at Fox Nutwork would have us believe. Also, check out this laughable entry in the ACORN paranoia sweepstakes; this entry nearly rivals the meme that "far-left" ACORNers are going to be hired for the 2010 Census, therefore all wingers must lock and load!

Crazy ass hysterical fools...

(Photo: you remember these dumbasses from an earlier teabagging... yeah, comptetunence!)

Frank Levels Smart-Ass Harvard Winger

Thanks to "Sadly No" for giving us this gem,
Barney Frank's textbook pwning of one Joel Pollak: Harvard student, avowed "conservative," future Fox Nutwork correspondent, and no-doubt member of the Likud Party - American Auxiliary. Happy Passover, putz!

More Winger Woe

A new Pew poll confirms that President Obama and the Democrats enjoy a large advantage over the Rethuglicans among the American public. His trip abroad was well received by a wide majority of Americans. Overall Obama job approval rating: 61%, up from 59% in March; only 38% have a great deal or fair amount of confidence in the Rethug Congressional leaders to fix the economy, vs. 55% for the Democrats.

The epic fail continues. . .

The Latest False Wingnut "Outrage"

It appears that President Obama actually bent forward to shake the hand of Saudi King Faisal at the recent G-20 summit, and the wingnutosphere is OUTRAGED!! He bowed, they say. This coming from a crowd that idolized Preznit Chimpy, who was a virtual vassal to the Saudi royal family. Keep trying, wingers.

(photo: Who says French kissing is un-American?)

I Thought I Was "Da Man"

Rethuglican National Committee chairman Michael "Tin Man" Steele has been disinvited to speak at an upcoming wingnut anti-tax on the wealthy "Tea Party" event in Chicago. It seems the tea-baggers thought Tin Man decided to appear at their event only when it gained some media attention. We're shocked, shocked!, that the tea-baggers have such a cynical view of Tin Man.

By the way, Tin Man, how's the "off the hook" public relations campaign going for attracting folks in "the hip hop urban/suburban setting?"

Ebert's Smackdown of O'Liely: Priceless

Fux Channel's Bill O'Liely's syndicated column was dropped recently by the Chicago Sun-Times (a trend we hope continues with other newspapers). O'Liely, of course, threw a tantrum and called for an advertising boycott of the Sun-Times, much like the boycott he called for UPS, when they dropped their advertising from the O'Liely Factor.

Well, the Sun-Times renowned film critic, Roger Ebert, had this open memo to O'Liely on his website, and it's worth reading. . .especially the last paragraph comparing O'Liely to Squeaky the Chicago Mouse.